I've had a few quiet days at home alone because my regular CNA is out. It's been peaceful.
I hate to use words like peaceful then mention small moments with tea concerning my life, at the same time as the news reports more than 50 people have been murdered by a gunman in New Zealand.
So I'm sipping fine orchid tea from my favorite mug and my heart can't even smile. There is no peace, and there hasn't been since this early morning when I first heard about it.
After I heard the sheer volume of terror caused I did what others did. I goggled "does New Zealand have the death penalty?" No, they do not have this barbaric penalty. But right now my heart turns to barbarism and asks why he and his accomplices should live when they have changed the lives of so many people forever? Sometimes the death penalty seems right. Barbarism is what he played out on the world and I'm wondering if a News Zealand prison is harsh enough for him or should he be transferred to San Quentin in California?
I think what shocks me too is that it's New Zealand. Had it been Sweden, France, G. B. London, the United States, it wouldn't leave a question mark. But, New Zealand? Really?
Active shooters are such a part of American culture that even the Kingdom Hall of Jehovah's Witnesses has been given instructions on what to do. When we went over active shooter information at my congregation my heart blead! The thought of someone walking into the house of my God with a weapon hurts deeper than words can express! How dare anyone ever defile a place of worship with hatred?
I shake my head to throw off understanding that some people have no respect for life and that hate is what they feed on. I shake my head.
I'm going to sip my favorite tea today and dig deep to find my inner peace. Whatever peace is in my heart, whatever calm and hopeful feeling I find, I'm going to accept because I'm going to need it. The day is early.