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I've slept quite a bit but I'm still alive and kicking. Any weather shift can cause a change in symptoms. I got off lightly with fatigue instead of higher pain levels.

The last few days have been cooler which has brought Mary Jane back to her old self. She's back to chasing the pencil as I sketch. lol. She's back to trying to sit inside my pencil box or in front of the screen so I can't see it. The best thing is hearing her pur box on full speed.

I've yet to figure out what I want to accomplish next week. No goals have been set. I know I need to get back in my little studio, at the table with paint and paper. I've been feeling distant and hesitant to express myself verbally or in art. There's a strong feeling of inadequacy and a lack of self trust that I can see a project through without messing it up. For this reason, I've put the piece Encaustic Rise to the side.

Issues with self confidence pop up from time to time. I won't attempt to pin it to a specific event, instead, I will focus on affirmations and creative resistance. I need to squash the harsh and crushing fear that I can't paint with any measure of success .... I believe I just came up with goals for next week. 

Faith

4

Potential - Glass half full It occurred to me that when abuse is reported the concerned person is saying that the person being abused doesn't deserve it.
The one who reports abuse is saying, this is unjust and I'm not going to sit by and let this happen.
The one reporting abuse offers their strength to the abused and offers their voice because they recognize vulnerability.
Even when done anonymous, it takes a healthy conscience and inner strength to report abuse. My mother had neither.

I understand why my mother never reported accounts of abuse we shared with her in strict detail. She never saw those kids as living beings with the universal right to safety and peace. She didn't recognize their worth. My mother probably never expected anyone to go to bat for me. How sorely she underestimated the worth of her children, too.

I honestly didn't expect  to survive her, but I did. Most days I'm happy I did because there's so much more to see and do.

Faith

Today I sold the painting "Wait for Me - Let there always be hope". When the individual saw her painting she was moved because she's going through a lot right now. This is the moment artists love, we eat it up.

As artists we put our very lives on canvas and hang it out for all to see. We love the oohh and ahhhh responses but when someone is moved right to the heart, it fuels us, validates us and propels our creative direction.

I so, so love the expression I saw on her face when I handed her the painting. I won't forget that for awhile. I feel like I was able to give someone something of value, a tiny bit of understanding and a little more rope to hold on to. It feels good.

SOLD
Always Hope - prints on Redbubble

"Wait for Me - Let there always be hope" found a wall of its own.

Art Title: Always Hope
Art by: Faith Magdalene Austin
Medium: Colored pencil and watercolor
Size: 5.5 x 8.5 inches
Finish: signed, unsealed, unmounted
Style: Abstract Expressionism, Modern

This piece has sold which means it is now only available in prints from Redbubble which is linked to on my sidebar. To see available art that can be purchased through PayPal or Etsy, please see the Available Art Gallery and Available, Too.

Thank you for visiting SUNDRIP - Art for Life

Live free. Create well.
Sundrip

1

I didn't think about much at all. I just did the things I love. It was a much needed day of solitude, a mini mental vacation.

She is a shining star, this furry one.

She melts my heart when she does the slow blink.

Mary Jane is an integral part of the process of slowing down to smell the flowers.

weeds? i'm good with that. I've been working on my terrariums, adding this, removing that as well as letting them be.

I was told these are weeds. I don't know. What I do know is there are plenty in the yard of an abandoned, boarded up house and that they have done well in various terrarium set ups. A month or so ago I walked 8 blocks round trip to get these bad boys!  ...continue reading "A day of solitude with the things I love"

7

I'm so mad I can't see straight! The changes that has taken place on Etsy have mad things very difficult.

One of the things I strongly believe is that customers understand the ins and outs of original art sales. There are always questions about why things have changed, why some items cost more than others and how prices are set. I want to be able to speak directly to customers so they understand not just the story behind the art but behind the scenes before it arrives on your door step. This is a world where information is gold. Open your pockets cause I'm about to fill it with info.

Shells - SOLDI made a sale today of some very pretty pink shells. I expected to go to my PayPal account and see the money but nope! The new forced way of Etsy Pay means I don't get the sale money of $14.00 until I make $25.

My item. My time. Their money.

So what do I do now? I've gone in and arranged things so that nothing falls under $25.00. That's not fair to customers at all. I hate that. I want to offer a variety of items. I was about to include antique buttons and clay pieces I made that would not have cost $25.00.

I'm so mad I could almost cry!!!! Literally real tears. You're kidding me??? You're telling me I work my butt off, advertise, get exposure, get a sale but I don't get the money?  Even selling another piece today to go from $14 to $25, I'd still not get paid until NEXT Monday! Really?

Y'all thought this was a reasonable? I don't think Etsy read the entry about my anger issues!!! Etsy is supposed to call me. .... (cue crickets). I know....I know.... this can't be a phone call like with my GP. The call from Etsy will be so zen. I will speak in a reasonable way. My words will be free of sarcasm as I speak to corrupt Etsy. OMG!!!!

Trees Lot Art Sale

I work so hard on that Etsy shop. I arrange and rearrange the items on a regular basis to give people a fresh view of the shop. I update policies and try to offer a variety of items with a range of prices. I want to do right by my customers. I want options, quality, fun. I want fine art, experimental art, vintage Indian scarves. Sundrip was going Artisan until Etsy gave me a wake up call. 

I've been selling art for more than 12 years but I just realized that I now work for Etsy. The fees for selling on Etsy are this: There's a fee to list, a fee for selling and a fee for the way the person pays. Yes, three sets of fees per sale item. If a person purchases 3 individual items from I pay 3 sets of fees per item. Do I have a choice? I do not. I am required to accept what they call "Etsy Pay." Now you know why prices an fluctuate. But I try to be reasonable. I don't want to pass these costs on to customers. I try my best to keep prices reasonable. You can read more about how I price my art here.

Lot of Three Surreal Art Therapy

Here is how I've changed some of the prices and listings. In some instances I've created lots. I've combined art pieces into two or three pieces for one price without jacking the price sky high. I considered this as a way of a clearance sale but Etsy has forced my hand.

Lot of 2 black and white line artAs far as butterflies and vintage wallpaper cut out that were to be offered on ETSY, I will need to offer them here on Sundrip via PayPal. It's cleaner, faster, easier. I prefer that with all my art, to just go through PayPal. I need to figure out how to sell solely from my website so that situations like this don't impede the transfer of art from my studio to your walls.

Butterflies cut from dried leaves - available only on SundripI need to work on selling primarily from Sundrip, I have somewhere to go today which means I can't think about Etsy right now. There will be an exercise in putting this situation away until I can manage it.

Despite my rant and the update on Etsy, you can be sure that you will always get more than you expected from Sundrip art.

Deep breathing and TRUST that I'll always have enough.

Jordan

As I said, I've been exploring watercolor. I haven't done that well with proper techniques but I have played a lot. Here are some abstracts created in watercolor after a session of trying to do stuff right. Play is important. 🙂

Color Rush and Deep Purple Paper are my favorites. In a few of these I dipped stamps in watercolor and stained the paper then began to pile color until I was satisfied. I used a pallet knife to create texture and one had alcohol sprayed on it. That was fun. Three of these have an acrylic finish but two do not. They feel like they could be a small framed painting or even the background for an encaustic art piece.

All are roughly 4 x 6 and are on cardstock, watercolor postcard paper and sketchbook paper.

Faith

We're half way through the year so I thought I'd take a look at my goals and see the progress. I've listed the goals on my sidebar to have them on the front burner.

CREATION WITHOUT JUSTIFICATION

2017 Art Goals

1. Create a brand and get business cards
2. Explore more abstract art forms
3. Explore use of watercolor
4. Paint, draw, create, fearlessly

I've finalized the logo / brand.  I've finalized a business card design. The painting it came from is no longer for sale.

I'm going to say, absolutely, positively yes I'm on the right track with this goal. 🙂 I may be terribly behind on scanning but I have worked my butt off using watercolor. I've been watching a few blogs that work with ink and watercolor to see how they express themselves with that media.

If I've learned one thing it's that I need to be more prepared before I begin a project. When sketching and painting I start with a line and go from there. I have no set in stone idea of what will come out, I just let the pen or pencil move. When working with watercolor I think I need a more solid idea, something from my head to use as a guide so I lay the colors down without overwhelming the paper with a bunch of color. I will say this, I work to use watercolors correctly but I also let myself play which means I've got all kinds of failed watercolor projects and a ton of very fun explosions. I get frustrated with watercolor at times but I do enjoy it.

I'm still exploring abstract with acrylics. I've got my set of pallet knives that I love, love, love. I've been working in white gesso just making textures and such so I can later lay down some color. I've checked out a few bloggers who focus on abstract work. They've been very helpful.

Do I paint, draw and create fearlessly? Most of the time I feel I do.

There have been times when I've uploaded a drawing and one of the figures has an eye that's larger than the other. I feel like it doesn't translate well on the monitor. I worry less that sketchbook art is created blurry. I worry less about my lines, colors, all of that, especially if it's just my personal sketchbook. I just keep going. When I have a hard time feeling my fingers and have to shake them every 3 or four minutes, I do it without being too irritated. I'm shaky at times,, agitated, unable to sit and draw so I walk and draw. I let myself be who ever I am and let my health do what it's going to do. I just keep painting. I continue to draw figures the way I want to draw them, with the expression I want to use and the colors I want to use. These issues and more used to stop me from sketching but I have been working very hard to just be and create.

I'm working with four different sketchbooks as well as a few art assignments for therapy. There's a lot of art going on over here.my baby girl watching over the sunflower drawing

You know what's funny? I still take photos of myself on the 17th of each month. I've also started taking one of Mary Jane in virtually the same spot on the 17th of each month. Mary Jane, strike that pose baby girl!

Jordan

2017 Therapy and Life Upgrades

THERAPY

1. Speak to myself kindly
2. Begin the first steps in treating water phobia.

LIFE UPGRADES - continued from last year

1. Listen to hear instead of listen to respond. Monitor dogmatic expressions.
2. Continue volunteer work.

I get a D on dogmatic expressions and laying down the letter of the law. OMG I'm stubborn and opinionated. WOW!! Who knew it would be so hard to shut up and let others have an opinion, even when I know their opinion is obviously so far from reality that it crosses into insanity? It is not my job to lead people. I do not need to convince people that they have a stark divide from reality and that it gets on my last nerve to the point I want to bash them with a chair. OMG, where did all these stupid people come from? It's like there was a whistle only stupid people could hear and they just all came out of the wood works. I now have a whistle phobia....AnyyWayyy.

I do not believe I should have a totally open mind because that means anything can get through. I should be the one to dictate what gets in and how open my mind should be. That is called free will. I know what my core belief system is. I will be open to many things but my foundation is not up for debate or assault.

I do not have a buffer so when conflict arises, my mouth starts going. I have to be more mild in speech and behavior toward others. I need a more mild spirit, one that isn't easily provoked or agitated when others expression their free will.  I need to continue to think about how my words and actions will affect others immediately and long term. I have an obligation to be peaceful and peaceable which does not leave room for dogma. A mild word is powerful. Patience is powerful. Sometimes silence is called for, other times its flat out wrong. I'm looking for that balance. ...continue reading "Half Time Consensus: Therapy and Life Upgrades for 2017"

1

Strange Sisters - Young Children in the Sun Well, that was heavy. I felt relieved after writing that story. Reading over it I'm able to see how close I stuck to reality. I'll put this to bed after I process why I said there's a reflection of me in each character in the story Tea for Christopher.

Content: Physical abuse of a young child. Processing the previous entry. No sexual abuse mentioned or discussed.

Christopher
I'm primarily Christopher in the story who tries to manage the unmanageable. I had Christopher leave home just the way I did, an unplanned exit on a night of routine abuse. I couldn't do it another night, not another second. I left Feb 2, 1992 at 10:30 pm and I never went back home. I went to a hotel that evening then got up to go to work. I never went back home.
Just like with Christopher, I did watch my little brother beaten with a dowel rod. Just like in the story, he was held down with one hand by my mother and beaten with a dowel rod until he was no longer even screaming. I walked away and left him with that monster. A few days later he was removed from our home by Child Protective Services. I felt so broken by that loss.
It is safe to say, the story Tea for Christopher was triggered by what happened the other night outside my window.

Ruby, the mother
It's interesting that the mother wasn't given a name until about the middle of the story. I realized I kept calling her 'his mother'. I didn't think too hard about a name for her but I immediately rejected Diamond. Now, the name Ruby seems appropriate only because of the color.
Why am I the mother in the story? I see how much my life revolved around creating situations that would appease my abuser while ignoring myself and my needs. An abused child is always at the beck and call of the abuser, there is no time for anything else.
I never told her, but I apologized in my heart for being a bad daughter. Though my mother left us repeatedly (a few days tops) there was a constant threat of being sent to the orphanage where my grandfather grew up. She was neglectful in criminal ways. Abandonment issues are still a huge problem for me. ...continue reading "Thoughts on Tea for Christopher"

The manager sent me a sugar sweet letter and a new lease to sign. I'll be in this apartment at least another year. Having that much stability, I've moved forward with the dollhouse plans.

Wallpaper Bedroom 1Although the dollhouse looks the same on the outside, much planning is in the works. I've chosen carpet and wallpaper for each room and I've pulled out the box of parts to finish the roof. The roof is still going to be living succulents which I've been babying over in the plant area for a while now.

I'm combining three Greenleaf Dollhouses. These houses aren't terribly expensive. You can buy them anywhere from $22 to $999. There are a lot of options. Greenleaf offers additions for the house in the form of cheap looking furniture to a new wing on the house. They've got a lot to offer I think. ...continue reading "Dollhouse Update"

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