Daily Archive for October 30th, 2005

A Nice Day With A Little Nostalgia

Published on October 30, 2005 in For the Record, Gratitude Journal and Pets. 0 Comments

 

7:20 PM

It’s been a nice day. My cheeks were sore from smiling all of last night. No, I’m kidding.
I got about 4 hours of sleep last night. I laid there wondering why I was awake. I guess I got to bed around 6am and got up at 10am. On that kind of sleep I got up, played with the dog outside for like an hour, came back in and did some journaling, listened to music and lounged. I then swept the entire house, swept the kitchen too, dragged a book case in from the trash and then made a roast beef au jous dinner. I won’t be doing that kind of work tomorrow. The only thing happening tomorrow is therapy and being Monday its clean sheets day. Yeah! I love clean sheets day. Sometimes I regret doing all the work in one day because it means I have nothing to do for a few days. I like to keep busy. The office area will need some serious cleaning and the bedroom needs some work so I guess I’ve got something to keep me busy when I start in again on Tuesday. Of course there’s the back up work I should have been doing a long time ago. There are so many files on this pc that it’s crazy.Sometimes the thought of stopping is incomprehensible. If I stop I’ll think, if I think I’ll feel and if I feel I’ll cut. I moved around today like I did back on that farm in Texas. I loved the work. I absolutely loved it. In Zionsville I taught handicapped children to ride horses. That was wonderful too. I miss the land. I miss the trees and the fresh air. I miss that red clay against the grass and the hills that kinda wound back into eternity. Man, it was wonderful there. I miss it so much. I always knew I wasn’t meant to be a city girl. Someday I’ll go back there. Captain has never gotten to see my home. In his life time we’ll have to go back there so he can play. I suppose the snakes might be a problem but I guess we’ll have to make sure we don’t go too far out. I remember that I need to look where I’m stepping. I know where to go and not to go and when to go and when not to go. He’s a Midwestern dog and has probably never looked a rattler in the face. It would be the last thing he looked at so I suppose we won’t go out into the fields or out on a hot, hot day. A friend of mine is about to move to San Antonia. Lucky girl. I have friends down on a ranch there. Man, beautiful land, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.

 

 

Austin, a long way from home

**As of April 1st, 2007 all comments to this entry have been closed. This is now an archived post. Feel free to drop me a line at the guest book link found on the sidebar**

To Maggie about a New therapist

Published on October 30, 2005 in Borderline Personality Disorder, Dissociative Identity Disorder, PTSD and Therapy. 3 Comments

2:50 AM

Maggie said…
I’m sorry Austin. It would have been best had you not told her you were going to meet another therapist just to get a feel for things. I can understand her not wanting you to see her and another therapist simultaneously, but it’s perfectly acceptable for you to do a little foot work and looking around. Sometimes clients forget that therapists work for them, and they either get paid by the client, government, or other source for their services. Like any other service, you have the right to choose the professional you feel is best for the job. There is nothing wrong with that. The first three meetings with any therapist are usually just for assesment and getting to know each other purposes, so I don’t understand why you should be forced to make a decision so soon. Interesting. If it’s any consolation, most people go through a handful of therapists before finding a fit, so don’t feel bad if it takes some time. Maggie
1:00 PM

Austin of Sundrip Journals said…
Well, she says it’s about ethics. I told her I understood ethics but that this was just unreasonable. My purpose for finding another therapist isn’t solely based on this experience with her. The clinic I go to changes students twice a year. In less than 2 years I’ve seen 3 social workers. This one will be gone in May i think. I’ve got abandonment issues out the wazzoo. I need someone a little more permanent. That is the major reason for looking for a new provider. I asked the 2 before her to help me find a long term provider and it just never got done. so i started doing it on my own. In addition to the 2 social workers leaving I’ve had 2 other pdocs. That’s a frikin psycho revolving door. So heck yeah, I gots ta go!

 

 

**As of April 1st, 2007 all comments to this entry have been closed. This is now an archived post. Feel free to drop me a line at the guest book link found on the sidebar**