The People Behind My Eyes

I started my Gratitude Monday journal entries, joked about Sarcastic Tuesday and FU Friday. I thought I covered all my bases. I forgot about Bad Luck Wednesday and it can only get worse from here Thursday.

Despite my streak of bad luck today SG and I had a pretty nice time. On Sarcastic Tuesday she and I went to Target and played dress up with their clothes then put the over priced items right back on the racks. We took plenty of pictures of us in their hats and scarves. It was fun. I thought we might get tossed out of Target making us two the only people on the earth to be police escorted off the property having stolen nothing at all. Today she and I had a pretty good time too. It was the time when I left to go to therapy when things turned for the worse.

I got up; I made breakfast, showered, fed the furry ones and packed my backpack to go get my head shrunk. I kept thinking, “I’m forgetting something.” I got in the cab with my regular driver, we shot the breeze, and talked about the porto-lette that survived the F1 tornado winds as we enjoyed the short ride. Things were fine until I went to get out of the cab and go into my session. The wind caught the door as I was letting Captain out. The door knocked a full cup of coffee onto my pure white shirt and on the outside of the cabbies door. I didn’t flinch. I emptied the tiny remnants of coffee on the ground, put the cup in the bag and went inside to wash the coffee off me.

Fast forward twenty minutes:

As I sat in the center for survivors just barely escaping third degree burns from the coffee assault I was informed that I was one day early for my therapy appointment. I burst out laughing. I showed up for therapy on the wrong day.

Rewind:

In my life things go from bad to worse within seconds. When I washed off the coffee I realized that the wet white shirt was showing my pretty new hot pink bra with its pretty white embroidery and rhinestones. So, I’m walking around with one tit for everyone to see through my shirt and a bunch of coffee from the cup that attacked me without provocation.

This to me is hilarious. It’s small on the grand scheme of things. Only after the public nudity was I informed that today is Wed and not Thursday. I called my cab driver back, who went to the car wash to clean off the coffee from the side of his cab. He came back and we traveled home in silence.

The coffee in the cup was Starbucks. Damn you Starbucks. Damn you! The first cup was nasty but I later found out it was because I put too much of it in the pot. You can’t make it like you make the cheap stuff like for example Folgers. Since I thought Starbucks was nasty I gave it away to my neighbor UK. When I realized that I just made it wrong I went and bought a small container of Folgers and then repossessed the Starbucks from UK. I gave it to her and then took it back. So I guess today was pay back from Starbucks. Damn you! Damn you! I should have stuck with Folgers. I’ll know better next time.

Austin