No You Really Don’t Want That-Friday, September 01, 2006-11:47AM
I looked at him like he was crazy when he asked me this unbelievable question. He was dead serious but to me, it shows his total loss of contact with reality. The other day Barney was served with papers because of his yard and his falling garage along with the extra toilet parts, the unmarked chemicals and the rusted nails that he refuses to clean up. He is being sued for $2,500 plus court costs. They’ve been telling him for six years to clean up his yard but being the slacker he is he just asks for extensions and then goes on about his slacker-life like any true slacker would. After six years of extension they refuse to give anymore and want to hall his butt into court on the 29th of this month. He had the nerve to ask if I’d go and testify that he’s been trying to maintain the yard. I said, Barney, “You really don’t know what you’re saying, perjury is against the law and I’m really not prison material.” In my truly sarcastic and almost cruel way I went on with how he would end up in jail because I know way too much about his trifin’ ways. I know what he does at his computer in the middle of the night. I was witness to that date of his that tore down the stairs and ran out of the house to get away from his skinny self. So no, you really do not want ME to talk to the judge, not ME.
Joan of Arc, inside Morton’s Pride
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