The People Behind My Eyes

Dear Harley Davidson

Wednesday April 30, 2008 at approximately 2:50PM the unspeakable happened. I was on my way to therapy (thank God because I needed a professional’s help to process what I saw) when out of the corner of my eye was a man who took one of your bikes, painted it cobalt blue then added orange, yellow and red flames. The offender even had a cobalt blue helmet with a flame on the side. I am so sorry this has happened. The only thing that could have made this day worse for me would have been had the offender spun his back tire on the head of a beautiful sunflower. Had said offender done this I’d be in a total state of shock and unable to report his heinous acts against your company and all who appreciate your products.

I feel I’ve let you down as I was unable to bring myself back from the shocking blue in order to record his license plate number. Had I gotten his license plate we might be able to get this impostor off the streets, for surely your company didn’t send out a hog like that. It was horrible a disgrace to all that Harley Davidson holds dear. He even flew the wings. How dare he?

In the state of Indiana it is lawful to shoot riders on ugly impostor Harley Davidson hogs, but I’m not a registered gun owner. I fear my unregistered fire arm may have been used in a few flower shop robberies. A heavy set black woman is seen on camera demanding sunflowers and their seeds, but that’s a whole different story. My point is, though packing, I didn’t shoot the man. I let him go and for that too I am deeply grieved.

Dear Sirs, I weep for you and for all who love you and hold you in high esteem. I wish for us to never again see such a thing.

Sincerely and with much respect,
Austin of Sundrip Journals