I drew an outline of the doll on the material then cut her out and sewed her. Since I have a history with needles I had to sew her up right to the top of the head then stuff her. I couldn’t sew the body then add the arms and legs because it felt like I was putting needles in the hands of a child… of a little me. I have a very difficult time separating myself from dark coloured dolls. Putting a needle into the hands or feet of the doll is too much so I have to find another way to put her together. I found it easier to do less cutting and to only have to turn her inside out and put the stuffing in through the head. I then wound yarn, put it in the open part, doubled it and sewed it in. For some reason I was able to stay grounded while doing that.
I knew where the needle was at all times. It never touched the floor where it could possibly get lost and find it’s way into to souls of my feet. I stuck my hand a few times but it was manageable. When it happened a few times someone inside said, “I don’t like the feeling of needles in my hands.” That sounds rather strange to say but when being beaten the mother would say, “Does this feel good?” My expected reply, “This feels good mommy.” So when someone inside said, “I don’t like the feeling of needles in my hands” it was rather healing.
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