Dear Little Chipmunk
Little well dressed rat who hangs on my porch soaking up the sun, your time here is limited. I noticed since the passing of my best pal Captain Crunch you’ve decided to boldly lay on my steps, sit on the arm of my broken down porch swing and dig in the dirt of my dried up plants. Well let me tell you this, don’t get too comfortable. This is a household that must have a dog. So, you do what you need to do while I grieve the loss of my pal, ya little furry disease carrying vermin. Sunbathe on my property if you will. Sit really close to my door if you must. But don’t get comfortable….nope, don’t get comfortable.
If you for some reason slipped into the house you’d be perfectly safe. I’m sure you could beat the crap out of both of my cats. Bella is all hiss and no scratch and Grace is scratch and run. They’re too domesticated to stick up for themselves. Bella might even try to bribe you to let her up from a chipmunk choke hold. Grace will get on her little knees and flash her big brown eyes hoping you’ll feel sorry for her and not swing her by her tail anymore. But a dog, well, a dog would mop you up. I’d have to pick you from his teeth. So listen up and listen real good, YOUR TIME IS LIMITED ya furry little so-in-so……The same goes for you damn squirrels, hanging out by the window looking in at Grace and Bell!!!
Sincerely,
Current Resident of the Human Kind
This is not a squirrel and chipmunk hang out. Look at him hanging out like some street corner hoodlum. I believe daily now I’ve opened my curtains to let the sun in only to burst out with, “Oh hell no! They’re taking over the yard. There goes the neighborhood.” This is like adding insult to injury. They know there’s no more threat…not right now anyway. Give me some time, there will be another slobbering, tail wagging, cold nosed K-9 in my life and in my yard. So watch yourselves, watch your little hairy backs.
Little Chipmunk-Monday, August 25, 2008-4:17AM EST
I love the picture of Grace and Bella. Critters of the neighborhood be for warned, “Your time is limited!!! Don’t get comfortable!! This is not your place to take up home. Soon, you will feel the wrath of a big furry one showing you who is boss and whose territory this is!!!” I love your post. I guess I needed to speak for your household too. I don’t like critters anyway and I love big dogs. Woof!
I should have photoshopped in a baseball cap on the chipmunk hanging out like he owns the place. Limited I say, limited!
Woof woof baby, woof woof.
That would be hilarious. Your response to me: LOL!!!
This was cute! However, I wouldn’t put anything past those cats! If they got ahold of that rodent, who knows, they might surprise you. In my household, Shalimar will definitely catch it first. I would suspect Tootsie to be the first to kill it, and Shalimar the first to eat it. But I’ve seen Shalimar ignor insects that get in and Tootsie make a very nutrious meal out of them. So who’s to say.
I do know that Bratley propably wouldn’t even notice the creature. It’s not a part of his family so it holds no importance to him.
In addition to the chipmunk and squirrel over abundance I saw today in my yard a hummingbird. This is the first time I’ve seen one in real life, she was pretty. I assumed it was a she since she wasn’t brightly coloured.
I toss out idle threats to the yard invaders but I do like seeing them. They’re cute.
My little fishy guy hits the side of the bowl so hard that I can hear him. I thought maybe I was losing my mind that I could hear him make bubbles in the bowl but the cats heard it too. That to me is strange. He makes noises in there and the cats and I can hear him. Strange little blue boy.
Austin