The People Behind My Eyes

I’ve had dreams for years about houses that I knew had to do with the condition of my inner self. At first the house was small and something no one but I could see. In order to get to it for safety I had to get past wolves and lions. Once inside the house no one could see or hurt me. Over the years the house got bigger and had furniture. The house was always in the same spot for years which was in my grandmother’s back yard but that changed as well. This house went from invisible to only visible to those who needed it then right to being remodeled and rented out. I ran to it one day and saw a For Rent sign on it. The landlord inside said a family had been kicked out of the house because they gutted it. I looked around and saw they’d burned the kitchen and the living room something awful. He said he had another family that would move in as soon as he cleaned the place up. I’d have to wait if I wanted to rent it. Available only to me then no longer available to me even though I owned it.

The house even evolved into one with a basement filled with people hiding from the cold and from someone searching for them. I can still see us all huddled together worried about who would come through the door. Each time someone entered we all held our breath until we saw a ragged individual with huge needy eyes. Then we took a deep breath and welcomed them into the huddle.

I always knew how symbolic these dreams were. I noted the changes as well as how easy it was to get inside the house. It never escaped me how it changed for the better or worse. I knew it was me, the house, the people, the reason the people were there. I knew it all had to do with me so I watched that dream very closely.

One of my dreams that I always enjoy is how I meet the same individual at a coffee shop. We sit and have coffee and talk like old friends then one of us has to leave. We hug and tell each other good bye. The two of us share this dream. What I mean is, in the dream I’m in her dream time and she’s in mine. She pops up here and there, seemingly out of nowhere then I stop whatever I’m doing and walk with her to the coffee shop. It’s always the same travel route, always the same coffee shop. Then one of us says, “Oh, I’m waking up” so we say our good byes. This young lady has been in my dreams for years. It’s quite fun actually. Although I remember most of my dreams in strict detail I hardly ever remember what she and I talked about. Also, I never see her face. She’s always wearing blue and yellow. We always have to travel through the shopping mall that’s a regular in my dreams and we always have to fight off some threat before finally getting to sit down and have coffee. But I hardly ever remember our conversations. I also don’t think we’ve ever discussed how we know each other. We just talk like old friends and are thrilled to see one another.

Austin

Inner Houses-Tuesday, October 28, 2008-11:58AM EST