. 
Scribbled on the back of this sketch is written, “I’m sorry she hurt you.”
When I look at this I see not just a hurt child but an angry little girl.
Daily Archive for October 31st, 2008
Perhaps I just like the colour red and that’s why I don’t run when I see red flags! Oh look red…me like red.
Is this a red flag or is it my own fears because I know I recently got out of a relationship with someone who has this disorder. First let me say, this will be offensive to people who have Bipolar disorder. What I’m about to say may sound harsh and I’d be offended if someone said this about DID. So please, I apologize because I know this is offensive. I need to say it though…..
In addition to the Borderline traits of Blossom she is also an un-medicated Bipolar. She was so hard to live with and deal with because of the Borderline but once you add mania to it she became unbearable. She was manipulative, spiteful, petty, underhanded and sometimes down right cruel. She’s a small little child in an adult body. Then toss a serious under managed disorder in there and you’ve got yourself a homicide defense. She made me so angry sometimes and so confused. I never knew what to expect. Now I find out Chi is Bipolar One and I think to myself, well fuckin-A. Yes, that’s right, that’s exactly what I thought. Fuckin-A!!
When she told me I said, “Um, I asked you about this. That’s the very first thing I asked you.” I suppose that makes all the other answered questions null and void. Argh!!! She said she knows Blossom and she’s not Blossom. Continue reading ‘Turn And Run or Stay and Observe?’
I would say I don’t know what my issue is but I do. Right now all I can do is sleep. I’ve slept most of the time since therapy. I even skipped seeing my “hug therapist”. That would have done me some good but I didn’t even go. As I was all curled up under a ton of covers I thought to myself, it would be nice to fall asleep in her arms. I started snoring after that and only got up to the clock to care for those with fur or answer mother nature.
In other news, I was planning a Random Friday entry concerning Halloween and childhood antics but who knows if that longer more detailed entry will happen. I think I’ll just give a few quick lines and leave it at that. Here goes….
My family didn’t celebrate this holiday or any other ones but like most kids I really wanted that candy. During my 4th grade year I skipped school and went door to door with a good story sure to get me all the candy I could ever want. I knocked at the first door and told the lady I was unable to go out the night before because I was with my grandmother. I made a hand motion meaning it was a long story then said, “Anyway, I was wondering if you have any candy left over. Would you mind giving me a few pieces?” Door after door this story worked. They gave me all the candy they had left, after all I just implied I spent the evening with my sick grandmother instead of begging along side the other kids. I was a good and helpful, innocent and sweet little girl just trying to get a treat before going back to care for her sick grandmother. The little girl with the big brown eyes, two pony tails and a scheme bigger than herself had to go home to drop off candy then come back out. That’s how well it worked. Now doesn’t that beat dressing up like a Star Wars character only to get half a bag of treats?
Some might say I was a “special child” but I call that innovation. I think I was ahead of my time.
Austin (yawns with mouth wide, wide open. I must return to bed)
Tricks and Treats-Friday, October 31, 2008-3:35AM EST
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