Daily Archive for May 26th, 2009

An Act of War

Published on May 26, 2009 in Abuse, Art, Soapbox and Stupid People. 10 Comments

I figure if I’m civilized enough to leave them alone while they’re here they could be gracious enough to leave my stuff alone. I came out to get ice and saw 5 oil paintings on the floor!!!! They moved my paintings and got dirt all over them. They moved my paintings which were out of the way drying so they could put a treadmill where they were.   I told Fife Senior in these exact terms, “If I’m kind enough to leave them the fuck alone while they’re here they should be kind enough to leave my shit the fuck alone.” Of course he lost eye contact while I cursed my head off but my goodness!!! Dirt on wet oil paintings. This is so wrong!!!!!!!!!!  One of them was on paper not canvas. It was wrinkled up on the floor. In my opinion this is an act of war. She might as well have kicked me in the gut. This bitch will hear from me. Enough of being civilized and giving her space, enough trying to be nice and keep the peace. Nope. Do not fuck with my artwork! Who in the hell does she think she is?

I was trying so hard not to curse like this on my blog anymore but damn!!! Come on, this is total bullshit to the extreme. This is why I don’t own a gun. I’d be in prison! Had I been here when she did it she would have met the one of me that doesn’t shake or tremble when she’s around. I left because I didn’t feel like dealing with her. When I got back and saw my stuff I was livid. Fife Senior told me what happened. I told him I hope she has oil all up and down her fucking clothes.  She has so crossed the line. Dirt everywhere? Wrinkled on the floor? Seriously? Really? War!

UPDATE:

Continue reading ‘An Act of War’

He Doesn’t Know

Published on May 26, 2009 in Abuse, Female Sadist, Pets and PTSD. 0 Comments

*comments are off*

Gus has no idea what PTSD is nor does he have the slightest understanding of why I react in anger when he does stuff that triggers me. He has no idea why I ask him to get off the bed because he’s licking his paws or because he took to long to lay down and hovered over me. Sometimes he pants and shakes the bed. Argh!! All he hears is anger in my voice when these things happen. I try very hard to control it but sometimes I don’t do so well.

In therapy we talked about that head movement he makes and the slurping sound as he licks his paws. I can’t stand it. I immediately become furious. He has no idea why. I’ve had enough dogs to know they all lick their paws. They lick them when they’re bored, after they eat, before they go to sleep. They’re constantly doing that. I know this but it still gets to me.

In relation to this head movement Dr. D and I discussed details of sexual abuse by a female that many don’t want or need to ever know.  Continue reading ‘He Doesn’t Know’