Monthly Archive for April, 2010

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No ! and other stuff

Published on April 18, 2010 in Pets and Soapbox. 3 Comments

The last time I didn’t say no she brought me an iguana. This time she woke me from a sound sleep to tell me she’s on her way with an effing Pomeranian. No, no, no, no, no. I literally had an instant headache. No, no, no, no, no. It’s been hard to pull my curled up nose off the ceiling just thinking about that thing. Yuck!!!

A guy from Shelbyville came the other day to get Wilson the Green Iguana and Moeisha the Chubby Frog. Little dogs annoy me and some even seem disgusting but iguanas and frogs are cool. Continue reading ‘No ! and other stuff’

Two Things

Published on April 16, 2010 in Humor and Pets. 3 Comments

One – In just a few short hours I’ll be on the road again. I’ll spare everyone a YouTube presentation of that song. Just know I’m thrilled to death and I’ll be singing that as I speed down the street in the Aussiemobile. Little Nissan Sentra we’re about to hit the road once more.

Two – I finally, finally punched out a piece of art work. You can see it here. Don’t forget to look at the close up view.

Oops, there’s a third. The cat, Mary Jane, is such a sweetheart. Not only does she let me hold her she lets me hug her. The girl is too sweet. One thing that wasn’t mentioned in her ever so specific adoption ad was her huge front teeth. I’ve never seen anything like it in my life. The girl has vampire teeth. Even though she’s got a vampira thing going on she’s beautiful, loving and calm. She’s been wonderful.

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Mini entry: But I Was Respectful

Published on April 15, 2010 in Humor, Mini Entry and Pets. 0 Comments

Well Ma’am, I’m not sure why you’re upset with me. I was respectful when I declined 24/7 in MY home care for your un-neutered cat at a rate of $20 a MONTH for the next 2 months. Even when you suggested I’m money hungry I didn’t direct you to a flaming hot location. Why then are you mad at me?

you gotta be out cho damn mind. $20 a month in my home and you “might” tip me if you like how well I cared for him. get away from me woman. i’ve never been to jail in my damn life but you’re pushin’ it.

Thurs, April 15th, 2010 3:12am EST

In My Little Red Beret

Published on April 14, 2010 in For the Record. 1 Comment

Schwinn Meridian Adult Trike, Blue

Someone dangled this carrot in front of my face last night. They’re looking for an adult three wheeler for their daughter with mild M.R. and told me about it. I miss bike riding so much. I could see me on this thing riding around in my little red beret to the side, high top converse and fresh herbs in the basket. Weeeeeee, zoom, zoom, zoom.

I’d be unstoppable, a force for golf carts to reckon with.

It’s been so long since I rode a bike. I use to ride one to class all the time. I rode it to therapy and just about anywhere else that was within my ability. I miss it. It’s one of those things I had to come to terms with when I realized my physical strength is not what it use to be. But to give it up hurt. This here is a possibility, maybe I can be reunited with one of the things I lost to Lupus. I can just see me riding along in my little red beret. Man I can so see that.

fma

The Real Issue

Published on April 12, 2010 in Anger, Depression and Emotions. 7 Comments

The issue is not what I’m focusing on. The issue is not that my roommates son is a bum nor is it that Senior is filthy. This time the issue is none of those things yet it is what I focus on to keep from looking at my own stuff.

I hear in my head a rant/rave that has played a hundred times before. Why can’t Senior put a friggin’ dish in the sink? Why do these two have an aversion to communication? Why can’t Junior get a job and get off his lazy ars and contribute to the household? Why does Senior need to raise my rent to make up for what Junior uses in utilities? While all of that falls into the category of  “legitimate gripe” they are not my biggest, most pressing life issues; yet I focus on them because they are less painful than the real problems I have.

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DREAM: Drowing Baby, Rescued Child

Published on April 11, 2010 in Anxiety, Depression, Dreams, Emotions, PTSD and Therapy. 0 Comments

Dream One, April 11, 2010 @ 11am

I had to use the restroom at school so I walked down the hall to the girl’s restroom. Inside I saw a lady holding her baby’s face under the faucet. She was running cold water on the babies face. When I asked her what on earth she was doing she said the baby was okay and that he liked it. The baby fit into the sink and was small enough that it could lay on it’s back without twisting. She then flipped the baby over and let the water run on the back of his head. He spat and sputtered until his mother turned him over on his back for more water in the face. As she did the sink grew as large as a whirlpool big enough to fit four people. I climbed into the whirlpool as did the mother and a toddler who suddenly appeared.

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Walmart – The Search Continues

Published on April 10, 2010 in Humor. 0 Comments

We’ve all seen websites dedicated to exposing how ramped mental illness is amongst Walmart shoppers. We’ve seen an old man dressed like the tooth fairy, Santa Clause who really let himself go and a grandmother dressed in leather who was most surely packing heat. What we haven’t seen is a normal person at Walmart. I am on a quest to find just one normal Walmart shopper. I know this person is out there. I will find them and when I do I believe they should sit down for an interview on The Today Show or even Nancy Grace and tell us how they’ve managed to keep their sanity amongst crazy shoppers.

I swear this is all true…….

Continue reading ‘Walmart – The Search Continues’