Yesterday I was kind of down in the dumps. Lets face it, I was frustrated and angered by a personal situation that doesn’t seem to be getting any better. Because I felt I’d royally messed up I began to think of myself as one who can’t get anything right. Well, that had to stop because the last thing I needed was to hear my own voice telling me how worthless I am. So, what did I do? I took stock then realized what I needed was to accomplish something positive. I needed to use one of my coping skills (creativity) and come up with something I could finish that day with success. I narrowed my focus then turned my attention to my positive skill sets.
After figuring out what I wanted to do I grabbed some clay and went to work. What I came up with were two ornaments, one blue and one brown. I suppose what I created is no masterpiece but that’s okay. I wanted to complete something I was proud of, something I could look at and say, “I did that. I made that.” It didn’t have to be gallery quality or something that would go on the market for a hundred bucks or so. Nope, I just needed a creative boost. I’m pleased to say I got it. You can see all the photos here but I’ve also included a small photo in this entry.
I respond to discouragement in two ways. If I respond with depression then I shut down, isolate and go further down hill. If I respond with anger I become energized. I want to stand up and act and work towards moving ahead instead of sitting and wasting away. For me anger can be a motivational force for good not one for the destruction of myself or others. I’m pleased I can actually feel the kind of anger that makes me want to move my feet, to get up, stand up and create.
A little bit crafty, a little bit Zen
This anger did not own me. I told it what I wanted it to do. It worked for me not the other way around.
I think you did something great!
I know that for me/us, when we are really sad or depressed, it is really hard to think about doing something positive, let alone actually doing it. Based on our experiences, we imagine that this took tremendous energy and courage; we also imagine that it took huge effort to ‘get it going’ and to follow through on it fully. We also know the ‘down in the dumps’ feeling was still happening inside on another level. We’re glad that you were able to use your anger to work for yous!
Good job on doing self-care, and great job on stopping the worthless thoughts. You’re an amazing friend and a remarkable survivor!
I love them. I think they are great and very healing. You have a positive impact on my life and my healing, all the time. So glad that I have you and your blog. Good and healing thoughts to you.
Kate