Daily Archive for August 25th, 2010

You Can’t Win

Published on August 25, 2010 in Anger, Emotions, Female Sadist, PTSD, Relationships, Therapy and Trust. 0 Comments Tags: .

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Me:  It doesn’t matter what you do, you can’t win with me.
Dr. D: I’m not trying to win or lose.
Me: I mean no matter what you do today it won’t be right. I just doesn’t matter, I’m too angry to hear you.
Dr. D: I thought you felt better, that’s what you said Monday.
Me: I do feel better. I don’t fear that I’m going to walk in front of a bus like I worried about before.  That’s better, I’m not nearly as impulsive, but I still don’t care and I still just don’t want to be here.

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A Garden Indoors

Published on August 25, 2010 in Gratitude Journal and Pets. 2 Comments

I talked to my friend Grace on the phone today. When talking to her I needed a bit more light so I went to turn on the fish tank light and discovered 3 of 7 fish dead. They couldn’t have been dead more than an hour because I’d just turned the light off and saw them swimming around. I don’t know what happened in that hour to kill off 3 of them but they sure are dead. That totally sucks. The three fat ones I’ve had the longest are at 8 inches and seem hardy. Lets hope they remain that way.

I have 4 tanks but only three are stocked. I keep the 4th one ready to use as a hospital but I had no idea I’d need it because there was no sign at all that they were ill. Whatever changed happened quickly and took 3 fish out in a nanosecond.

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