Inspired Love List

I ran into a journal entry called Love List on the blog MotherLovely. For those of us with serious mother issues read the title again. It does NOT say motherly love, it says mother lovely. Anywhooo, the entry talks about looking around your house and noting things you love about your home. I like her idea for a number of reasons but for my purposes I’d like to change the angle a little bit and direct it to PTSD. She listed things in her home that she loves but I’d like to list things in my home that make me feel safe, secure, comforted and grounded.

First on my list are my dolls. I like seeing them. They aren’t just decorations but are comforting to look at.

The second on my love list is my art supplies. I have a ton of supplies and I seem to need to see them all. I’ve got a  work station set up where every art supply I own sits. I’ve got clear drawers that let me see their contents as well as small cloth boxes and open shelving. I need to see my supplies. I believe they act as a grounding tool for me.  I think I’ve shown this photo before but I didn’t mention that I like the cluttered look of it. This bit of chaos is very representative of the way I go about my artwork. There’s usually no plan, no set technique, nothing but a piece of paper and free will. I should note that the yellow is no longer on the table. The table has been redone but the other clutter remains. I need it that way. Yet another note: This clutter does not accurately represent the rest of my house. LOL

In no particular order I love the following comfort and grounding tools in my home:

My kitchen – I love my kitchen. The last place I lived I didn’t have my own kitchen, here I do. Although I love painting, it is culinary arts that’s truly in my blood. I was born to be a chef, it was what I wanted to be as a child and nothing else. I didn’t say, I want to be a lawyer, a doctor, a vet, etc, etc. I never thought of becoming a teacher or a seamstress or anything else. I’ve always known I was born to cook. No if, and’s or but’s about it. I was born to be a chef so boy was it torture to live 6 years without my own kitchen.

I burn candles every evening so candles have to be on the list of things I love about my home that give me comfort during times of stress.

In addition to my fish tanks and the small pond I have in my dining room (something like this) I also am soothed by the greenery around me. I have a ton of plants that I’m able to keep alive now. I had to do some research online to learn how to keep plants alive but I did finally figure it out and I’m pleased with the results.

I love my iPod. This little tiny machine has an alarm on it set to remind me to take meds 3 times a day. It not only holds my music but also a few story books and novels as well as audiobooks. I’m able to listen to audiobooks while resting which is really nice. I like to be read to.    Once I prop it up on its little  easel stand I can watch videos or slideshows. The most important role the iPod plays in my life is being able to take it in public with me. With headphones on I am able to better manage one of my most troublesome hyper-vigilance symptom. I sometimes hear everything and it gets to me but having on headphones helps me focus that symptom and control it so that I can better function in public.

Even though I’m crazy about pink I love the color blue in my home. I have country blue accenting earth tones which creates a nice calm, soothing and natural atmosphere. Even though I like other colors I can’t live with them. I can’t live with a bunch of colors like red, purple, turquoise, shades of orange or colors like them. It’s almost as if I have stimulus overload so I choose colors I can look at and feel calmed by. Country blue and earth tones help me feel calm.  (See 2nd to the last paragraph of Smoke and Mirrors for further explanation on emotional extremes. See also a community list of hypervigilance and hyperarousal symptoms. Feel free to list your own in the comment section.)

I enjoy a hot cup of tea brewed fresh in my favorite teapot. I even painted the darned thing awhile ago. At this time I have over 20 different types of tea but the two I drink the most are Twinning’s Earl Grey and TAZO’s African Red. I’m also a sucker for Egyptian Mint by Zhena’s Gypsy Tea. I actually paid $7 for stuff. It’s worth every dime though. One of the things I like about tea is stirring it so I spent a whole $2 on a pack of stir sticks. Ah yes, hot tea with a stir straw in my favorite mug and the world just seems right.

Last on the list but certainly not least is my windows. I have the best windows on earth…okay, maybe not earth but they are pretty awesome. I get sunlight all day long. They’re big and give a lot of natural light which I really like. The view from my living room is nice as is the view from my bedroom. Being able to see outside lets me know I’m not by myself out here. Sometimes it feels as if the entire world is closing in around me, the world feels small…bitter…. but being able to see outside and see the sun rise and set soothes me more than I can say. Seeing LIFE outside expands my tiny little existence and makes me feel as if I’m part of something bigger. For that I am truly grateful. No one likes to feel alone or lonely, insignificant or left behind. Being able to look outside into natural light helps my mood quite a bit. The windows are probably the best thing about this apartment.

That ends my love list. If you write your own list please link back so I can know where to read it. Also, check out the original { Love List } as credited at the beginning of this entry. Though I know nothing of the blog I can tell you this, we have some tastes in common when it comes to accessorizing the home. Gotta love her wall shelving and empty glass jars! We also have several of the same books.

until again,

Austin