Dr. D and I discussed my choice of pets. Since Joan is integrated it appears we aren’t as dog crazy as before. As a matter of fact we’ve come to a point where we aren’t even sure if we want one.
Dr. D said he’s noticed that we lean towards animals that we can’t get close to. He said that we can’t get close to fish, frogs or snails. He cringed on the snail thing. LOL I corrected him about bonding with fish. I acknowledged that the animals we keep as our own are slow moving, graceful, quiet and predictable. That is our PTSD issues coming in to play.
We talked about how some of the pets are unconventional.
Me: Fish are a common pet and having a pond in the living room isn’t odd.
Dr. D: It’s not conventional. Most have a dog or a cat.
Me: Fish are common. Heck, my grandparents had a waterfall in their house.
Dr. D: Yeah, but your grandparents were crazy.
I probably should have used a better reference than my grandparents.
i think fish do bond! i can remember how my fish would sort of flit around the tank when they saw me… they didn’t do that with my ex husband… i was their caregiver and i think they recognized that somehow…
and personally – not that it matters much – but i think it’s freakin awesome that you have a pond in the living room!!
He seems …. uninterested …. in fish all together so there’s no connection to it being a life that can make attachments or have emotion. Since he shows apathy for fish it would make sense that he isn’t able to see it as a complex being. Perhaps I should bring that up tomorrow. The whole pet thing has gotten deep in therapy.
I keep saying in the living room but its the dinning room. It’s got some updates recently too. I’ve surrounded the entire container with stones and added two small sitting angels.
it all sounds beautiful!
some times i think people forget that all life is complex, even in it’s simplest form…
it seems to me that having a pet, no matter what sort, is about care giving… some other life that you are caring for and sustaining… is that the point? or is attachment the point?
taking care of life, providing care and food and all that is a form of attachment isn’t it?
just rambling here…. you make me think… that’s a good thing
I’ll tell Dr. D that tomorrow. …..Yeah but Sherri said…..!!!!!
Really though, who is doing the attachment, me or them? Do they have to attach to me? Isn’t it okay that in this one particular safe situation I’m the only one attached?
I think he might be talking too about how much time I spend fishing instead of with real live people. Since the car has been down I’ve spent less time with the fin-less than I have with aquatic life. I’m sure that will be different if it gets running again.
I’m fighting to get this written because my cat (who is attached to me) is all over me. Dear Lord. I’m getting felt up by my cat. She kills me kneading bread on me.
Sherri said …….
lol cats… i’ve had them in the past and truly enjoyed them… but i must admit that i’m a dog person… cats are so independent that i don’t feel the same love from them somehow… although i know that’s not necessarily true…
so is the object of having pets for you to attach or for them to attach? or is the object for you to provide care and sustain life of another?
Dr. D sounds like a fun person to spar with a
and i’ve completely failed to make comment about Joan integrating… this is a good thing, yes?
The thing about Joan is both good and bad.
I need my pets to need me as much as I need them.
Fish and water are calming… There are still the bonds needed to care for them. Sounds like Dr D is “fishist”, or something
“fishist”
lol luv it