The People Behind My Eyes

Looking up from the TV program Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood , Barney says to me: Where are you going?
Austin: …. Um, to therapy….
Barney: All of my daughters have to ask if they can leave the house. They can’t just walk out.
Austin: Papa can I go to psychotherapy today?
Papa Barney: Yes but who will you be with? Do you have a way home?
Austin: (aka daughter 3 of 3): Bye!!!!!

Papa Fife isn’t here right now so I can’t ask him if it’s okay to leave again for therapy. I wonder if I should call his cell phone and ask for permission.

I wonder why Papa Barney doesn’t just come out and tell daughter number 2 of 3 aka Princess Fife that she can’t move in here with her husband and child.

This coming Friday Barney Fife (aka the roommate and Papa Barney) was going to go on vacation to Florida with girlfriend 2 of 4. They have timeshare down there and were going to spend a week together. Don’t you know Princess Fife (daughter 2 of 3) invited herself, her husband and child to go along on Barney’s vacation?!!!! I figure if they’re soooooo broke they have to move in with Papa Fife that they’re too broke to take off a week of work and go to Florida. With gas at $4 per gallon one would spend a fortune alone driving from Indy to Florida and back. But nope, she wanted to go so she invited herself. Papa Fife didn’t tell her no. As a matter of fact, girlfriend 2 of 4 simply canceled the vacation all together. Nobody is going to Florida.

To sum all this up: Two of three is moving in here with her clan, 2 of 4 is mad and 3 of 3 (that would be me) sits stunned that Papa Fife and 2 of 4 can’t simply tell 2 of 3 to get a grip and stop mooching off of others.

Basic Info: Barney says he’s adopted me. He has three daughters now. The first born (1), the second born (2) and then me (3). He also has a son Fife Junior. He has 4 girlfriends, Girlfriend Fife 1 thru 4, all numbered according to how much he likes them. He swears he likes girlfriend 1 more but he spends more time with girlfriend 2 than any of them at all. Daughter number 2 has no boundaries and is a moocher. Girlfriend number two nor Papa Fife can seem to tell daughter 2 to keep her ass at home so they canceled the vacation all together. Seems like everyone has come up with zero.

Since I’m now in the family I have to wonder, am I in the will?

Austin (3 of 3)

Two of Three and Two of Four-Wednesday, May 28, 2008-12:13PM EST