Sundrip Journals
Oh Steven, Steven, why? Why have you actually turned into a lady?I ran into a journal entry called Love List on the blog MotherLovely. For those of us with serious mother issues read the title again. It does NOT say motherly love, it says mother lovely. Anywhooo, the entry talks about looking around your house and noting things you love about your home. I like her idea for a number of reasons but for my purposes I’d like to change the angle a little bit and direct it to PTSD. She listed things in her home that she loves but I’d like to list things in my home that make me feel safe, secure, comforted and grounded.
It’s that time again. I turn 20 years free this year.
For this Independence Day I’m going to go to an aquarium exhibit as well as check out a few sales at Hobby Lobby and Micheal’s. Then on Friday I’m going to an art opening by an artist who is taking part in the Fringe Festival here in town.
Each year I have the same breakfast I had when I left home. Since I left and went to a hotel I ate there and had a breakfast of waffles, peaches and whipped cream. Lunch was quiche and salmon. I don’t quite remember what I did for dinner. I don’t know why but I don’t remember, anyway though, the other two meals are part of my Independence Day tradition.
Ah yes, here we are on the first day of Black History Month. I thought I might do something special this year and post a few articles I found interesting. The articles will vary, some serious, some not so serious. I’ll do regular therapy postings and toss in a few BHM entries. To start us off I want to share a few Librivox recordings of West African Folk Tales by William H. Barker. Reader credits appear at the bottom of this post.
Alright, about these particular folktales….In these tales you’ll find one main character which is a Anansi. Anansi is a false god who plays tricks on people for his own selfish gain. He lies, cheats and steals in order to make himself prosperous. This he does to the detriment of all around him, including his sons, wife and fellow villagers. Anansi sometimes appears in the stories as a spider or a person and sometimes a combination of the two. One thing you can count on with Anansi is that he is an abusive, neglectful, self-centered, “me first” kind of god. You’ll also notice that his selfish tricks always fail but not without consequences to himself and others.
Continue reading ‘Black History Month – West African Folk Tales’
The very first thing I do when there’s a new relationship is think to myself: how can I get out of this? Where is my exit?
I need to feel in control by serving. That sounds so strange but really, if I provide everything….food, comfort, clean clothing, a clean house, affection, etc, etc am I not in control? It’s also a set up because when things go south trust me, you’ll hear about how I did everything and got treated like shit. I cooked, cleaned, kept that house running and still got treated like shit. It’s a set up. I’m telling you, I’m not the person to go out with. I go in looking for a way out and I go in setting you up to fail!
At this time I’m not capable of truly loving you but I am capable of being co-dependent.
The situation: I called to set up an appointment to get my internet installed but the installer complicated things to the point that I had to call the company. The main complaint was his aggression and unwillingness to complete the install. He wanted to make sure the line worked but didn’t want to hook my PC up to the line. He wanted me to sign the paper before the job was completed, before I had my new phone number and before I had the email address associated with my account. In addition to that he kept doing that man burp you hear in bars. He did it 5 or 6 times while he was here. Totally gross.
Anxiety is no laughing matter…not usually.
Grace: I’m going to the doctor because of the anxiety. Hopefully he’ll prescribe some meds.
Me: That’s a good idea to go see the doctor but I heard going on a killing spree works just as well as any anxiety medication.
Grace: I heard the same thing.
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