Archive for the 'Art Therapy' Category

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Art Therapy: Changes in Black and White

Published on January 20, 2012 in Anxiety, Art, Art Therapy, Depression, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Emotions, Female Sadist, PTSD, Secrets and Confessions and Therapy. 1 Comment

I wasn’t feeling all that calm or collected at the time of these particular drawings which were done with an ink pen or black gel pen.

When I first moved here I thought to myself, my goodness, I’ve gone from the pan into the fire. For a minute that might have been true but its far from true now. For just a moment it was rough.

At first I decided not to do any more end of life foster care for animals or feed newborns. I figured it might be okay to babysit from time to time but I’ll limit that as well. I briefly did foster care for a 15 year old male tabby. His photo is among the sketches. Seeing that boy roll around in catnip was priceless!!! Ever seen an old cat drop about 14.5 years in a few minutes? Yeah, that was pretty awesome.

Some of my issues are the same, which I expected. I expected anxiety and stuff like that but I never expected to end up at my going to my mother’s house.  That blew me away.

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Art Therapy sketches, paintings, etc

Published on January 20, 2012 in Art, Art Therapy and Therapy. 0 Comments

I did a lot of painting, writing and sketching while off line. I won’t even bother to explain them. I just want to make sure I get them up here so I know where they are.

fma

 

A Face to My Anger Pt2

Published on January 19, 2012 in Anger, Art, Art Therapy, Emotions, Female Sadist, PTSD and Therapy. 4 Comments

……… My mother isn’t a mystery to me nor is she one dimensional. She is concrete which makes her a lot easier to me angry with.

Mother anger issues:

I have more memories of her than any other family member; including my older sister which may be one reason my anger towards her is stronger than other family members.

I was intrigued by her. I thought she was larger than life only to find out she was just another sadist in a dress.

I feel lied to. I feel as if my childhood was filled with lies by her and that I’m just now unraveling them and finding the truth. Each truth I find seems to bring up a little more anger for her.

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Preparations Permission Happiness

Published on October 11, 2011 in Art Therapy, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Emotions, Grief Sadness Loss, Love, Morton's Pride and Trust. 1 Comment

Two days ago I purchased a gift for my friend Maureen. I can’t wait for her to see it. I can feel her getting closer and closer which means I won’t be around again. I wanted to get her a thank you gift for all the homey touches she’s made here so I picked up a vintage ruler. It’s actually a wooden brick mason’s ruler but I know she’ll like it because it’s vintage. It’s a Lufkin No 636 and it folds up nicely.  For just a buck I can make her smile. I like that.

I know she’s getting closer. I know this because I can feel her, but this means I won’t be here. Since I won’t be around I went ahead and paid everything for the month and filled the house with groceries. I made sure there’s a variety of a food so that even if Robert takes the helm he’ll have food he likes. I need to get some chalk for our chalk board so I can write to Amy, L.J. and Little Anna that they can do the basics. They don’t know they can eat, get something to drink or use the restroom without asking. They have no idea it’s 2011 because they’re stuck in the year of their age. When I was their age I had to ask to do absolutely everything. I didn’t make a move until I was told to. Those three still ask.

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Excessive Apologies and Art Therapy

Published on July 18, 2011 in Abuse, Anxiety, Art Therapy, Borderline Personality Disorder, Emotions, Fear, PTSD and Relationships. 2 Comments

I stopped apologizing to the family that helped me move. I wanted to apologize for existing, apologize for the amount of dust in the house, apologize for everything. I apologized twice, I think, then told them there would be no more. It’s uncomfortable for others when I over apologize but man I wanted to say it every 5 min just so they knew I realized what I burden I was being. I didn’t because it wasn’t necessary. That family, my friends, were there not out of obligation but because they wanted to be. That feels good ya know? They didn’t have to, they wanted to help.

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Art Moves

Published on June 26, 2011 in Art, Art Therapy and Therapy. 2 Comments Tags: .

While sorting and making decisions on what will go with me on this move and what will not, one thing became painfully clear. I have a lot of art. I don’t want to move it with me so I’m offering a few pieces in my Etsy shop.

Rochelle's Dream small tin foil painting SOLD

SOLD Purple Flowers Watercolor Painting Original

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Art Therapy During Psych Hospitalization

Published on June 26, 2011 in Art, Art Therapy, Depression, Dissociative Identity Disorder, PTSD and Therapy. 0 Comments Tags: .

In the hospital there was a real art therapist who talked to us about establishing our own world. I kind of had a hard time hearing her because as she spoke I sat at her table filled with markers, paints, crayons, clay and paper. I nearly drooled.

Above my over joyed heartbeat I heard her explain that in our new world we’d decide who can and can’t come to our world. We’d decide if people worked, how they lived, how they got their food and so on. Everything was up to us. When I heard that part assignment I declined  to participate.  I just messed with clay while others drew a world they felt they could be happy in. Not surprisingly many removed the so-called good idea of capitalism. I found that interesting.

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