Tag Archive for 'friends'

The Stooges Three

Bella's Storm 1 About 7 this morning I crawled into bed with only one third of my family of three, whom I have affectionately dubbed The Three Stooges. Gracie, my four year old long haired tortoiseshell aka terror on paws, was under the bed hiding from the storm. Captain tried to fit his big o’body under there too but it didn’t work. Where was Bella? She was right at the window watching the lightning show.

So how is Captain Crunch these days? He’s well enough to bite a salesman who did not heed the “Beware of Dog” sign in my yard or the yard next door. Anyone bitten twice in the same day should hang it up and go home but did he, nope. The man hung around until someone called the police. They arrested the man. I have no idea why but they did. A patty wagon came and dragged his scrawny self out of here.

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Off the Mark

I usually handle the physical pain pretty well but right now I’m an irritable, angry mess. Add in therapy issues and poor sleep and you’ve got yourself one galactic bitch.

I’ve described chronic pain as a pair of glasses made for someone else that I’m forced to wear. I put them on and I’m to adjust my life to someone else’s eyes, a totally different depth of field and understanding of sight in general. I can’t see anything without it filtering first through those glasses. I can’t think straight in this kind of pain. Usually I do okay wearing someone else’s glasses, with my sight off the usual mark. But sometimes my vision is too distorted. My ability to function fails. My responsibilities fall to the way side and all I can do is wait for it to ease up. Usually I handle it pretty well. I go about my day, get stuff done and don’t complain outwardly. But add lack of sleep and therapy issues and I’m just pissed!!! I’m pissed, depressed and physically exhausted. That’s all I have to say about that.

My neighbor is having brain surgery. I’ll be taking care of his dogs while he’s gone. Three dogs, my dog and two cats and a bunch of me….this should be fun. Truthfully, I feel honored that he’d trust me in his home while he’s not there. He loves those dogs (he gives them beer but he loves them) and wouldn’t leave them with just anyone. They’re sweet. I enjoy my time over there. All I have to do is go over and let them out for a bit, fill their water bowl and feed them, that’s all. With my energy level the way it is it feels like a lot but really, I’m happy to do it. I know I just complained about pain and energy and everything but when someone trusts me with something precious I can’t help but accept the joy that comes with it. My twisted glasses do at least let me see that much.

Austin

Faded Moon

This is a shot from the recent full moon taken from the backyard.

Off the Mark
Tuesday, April 22, 2008 – 12:16AM EST

Dear Beauty and others involved in the conspiracy

Beckoning not BECONNING

HOW COULD YOU? How could you let the title of an art piece show up on several web sites misspelled? Not only did the painting appear on this blog, on the dot com and on the wordpress site but it also showed up misspelled on Flickr and on every feed associated w/ Flickr and every feed associated w/ Wordpress. How could you?

You , my friends who can spell let this happen. It’s not my fault. I accept no responsibility for that mistake, none at all. I’m supposed to have people, nay friends watching my misspelling back but no, nope you let me publish it that way and let it stay up there for days….days I say days! Then you rubbed my lack of spelling skills in by telling me you talked to Sissyface about it. Should you tell me? Hell yes you should tell me. When it comes to art TELL ME. Don’t leave me in the misspelled dark. No, there is no new slang expressing called beconning. That word is BECKONING. For the love of all that is artistic and holy someone could have told me.

Don’t think that JAGA or Kathryn (a school teacher okay…a.school.teacher) are off the hook for letting this thing go on for days. DAYS. Y’all conspired didn’t you? It’s one huge conspiracy against innocent, quiet, soft spoken Austin who never, ever rocks the boat and who is always soooo kind to others…sickeningly sweet as a matter of fact….so sweet she could give you diabetes, toss you into a diabetic coma of sorts she’s so sweet. I can’t go on….oh but I must. Where will the strength come from when I’m out here unsupported? Did I spell that right? Un-sup-port-ed.

Maybe a clue about my spelling ability came in when I did a test of the education level required to read my blog. Now how sad is this?

Check your reading level here.

I haven’t decided if this is a good or bad thing. Elementary school? Does this mean any level of education can understand my blog? Am I that versatile OR does it mean my inability to spell decreased my blogging status?

The Cheesemeister got Post grad College. Puts me to shame it does, puts.me.to.shame.

I Just Wanted A Nice Dinner

Me: Amy made it to one year old. It’s been so cool to see her grow up. She made it through the diaper rash and everything.
Holiday: Do we have to talk about diaper rash while I’m eating. Whose Amy?
Me: Haven’t you been paying attention? She’s the girl from the blog next door.
Holiday: You know they caught that guy who killed the cab driver the other day.
Me: Can we not talk about murder while I’m trying to eat.
Holiday: How is diaper rash better dinner conversation?
Me: A girl can’t properly digest like this.
Holiday: But diaper rash is better for your digestion?
Me: I’m just sayin’
(silence)
Holiday: Just eat okay.
Me: (under my breath) I was just sayin’ is all.

Another real moment in the Austin household. So what was on the menu? Baked Rosemary & Thyme pork chops served next to small pumpkins cut in half, baked then filled with wild rice and mushrooms. Made for good eating during our great dinner conversation. She’s not a coffee drinker so she had soda. Who has soda after a meal like that? I worry about that girl.

Austin

The Spontaneous Gathering

I had quite the nice week end with only one regret. I have no idea what possessed me to pick up a football and play with two 9 year old boys. I suppose I forgot that my bones are aged. But, for a bit I didn’t feel any pain. I just had fun. There was one 13 inch deep dish apple pie, 4 adults, two kids, 4 dogs and 2 cats. It was a spontaneous gathering of neighbors. Cappy Crunch got to play with his pals and I got to play football. It’s been awhile. I can’t believe I got my butt kicked by tiny 9 year olds.

This morning I sat on the porch in my big red fluffy warm slippers and smiled as I reflected on football and apple pie. I wish I had more pie and fewer football “memories.”

Austin

 

Tradition- Random Memory Friday

At Wally World the other day it didn’t register WHY a man stood beside the door ringing a bell. I only noticed he danced around with his headphones on. I wondered what was on his ipod but other than that I didn’t think about the fact that he stood there because it’s the holiday season. He wanted donations for the United Way. I got that but still, I wasn’t thinking along the lines of the holidays. I don’t celebrate them so I suppose I see things differently. I have to remember that even if I don’t think in those terms many others do. I have to try and remind myself (via email notification) that many of my friends will be kind of busy with family and friends. I wouldn’t want to call on Wednesday or Thursday expecting a friendly chat only to find that I’ve interrupted their celebration.

Can someone really totally and completely forget the holiday right up until the day of or even past it? Think about this for a minute, say you’re driving a car. You get in, you put the keys in the ignition, you look both ways and you pull off. That’s what drivers do. But suppose you don’t drive. What do you do? You immediately walk around to the passenger’s side door. You don’t go for the driver’s seat at all. It’s unnatural to do so. You’ve never done it before. You go for the seat you know, the seat you’ve always taken. You might be wondering, but with that darned holiday music and the trees all over, commercials about the perfect gift you can’t possibly be that dulled to the holiday season. People that don’t drive see cars everyday. They see different makes and models. New ones come out at certain times. They may even appreciate one make and model over another but it doesn’t mean they’re in the same mind set as a driver. Toyota advertises it’s big sale. Honda tries to out sell Toyota. The advertisements are everywhere. But still, if you’ve never driven are you really paying that much attention to car advertisements? Advertisements or no, if you don’t drive you all but block out information about driving if it doesn’t pertain to you on a personal level. They come every year with the coloured eggs, fright masks and holly but since that information doesn’t pertain to me I do what comes naturally, I go for the passengers side door. It’s normal for me.

This brings me to feeling down or blue on holidays. Since I don’t celebrate them then it’s just another day for me. I have no real mood change due to holidays. I get up, I take my shower, I drink my coffee, I start my day. It’s routine. Holidays for me are the same as Toyota sales. I’m no happier the days leading up to the sale, the day of the sale nor the day after. I’m not “a driver” so my mind all but blocks out that information. My brain looks for information it can compute. I go for the passenger side.

Since I was a kid the holidays have snuck up on my family. There’s a standing joke that there’s an R & S Holiday Mistake. (The R is her maiden name and the S was her married name.) It’s no secret that my mother’s cooking could be counted as abuse. Since she didn’t want to eat her own coking we ate out a lot. When we ate out we ate well. No fast food, no happy meals or Red Lobster type stuff. We ate well UNLESS it was Christmas or Thanksgiving or Easter. Our regular spots were closed so our options were limited. To Denny’s we went. Since she forgot to go to the store (she was riding not driving) we ended up with no food in the house and nothing to eat every single solitary holiday growing up it was like that. So, every single solitary holiday we ended up at Denny’s. It became tradition for us. She’d swear she would remember next year but nope, she forgot and so did my sister and brother. It snuck up on us so there we were at Denny’s every holiday, every year. I have to wonder sometimes if she loathed the thought of having to cook some horrible meal she’d have to eat so that’s why she forgot to go to the store. Either way, we laughed at the dinner table at the worst restraint in the city. Ah, I hated that place. The food isn’t that great, the booths were sticky and back then they weren’t really that friendly to person of the darker persuasion. However, somehow we made that day laughable and fun. It was like any other meal though. There was no special thanks given, no special food to commemorate the day. It was another meal for us, another car ride we were not emotionally attached to. So, please don’t think this was our holiday meal. We ate and we went home and did what we always did.

I look back on that and laugh because it was like dang it we were suppose to remember. But we never did. I don’t think of that time as a bad time. I remember it fondly. To start calling it the R & S Holiday Mistake was just too funny. Many times there wasn’t a can of green beans in the house. The woman knew she couldn’t cook so why even try? That was quite the blessing, her taking us out instead of forcing us to eat her culinary disasters. I have a feeling one of the main reasons I cook every meal (if at all possible) is because I ate out so much as a child. I managed to break the tradition because of my love for cooking at home so this year and last year and the year before I did get into the passengers seat, so to speak, but I had a safety belt. I had food in the cupboard. No Denny’s for this girl. I’ll have something homemade, something warm and inviting just like yesterday and just like today, warm and inviting. Then on Tuesday I’ll get an email reminding me that Wednesday and Thursday I need to make room for other traffic.

 

Austin’s August

Tradition- Random Memory Friday
Friday, November 16, 2007-11:18PM EST

reprieve

the vast majority of this day has been spent in laughter

and art work

this links to the art blog with detailed views

austin

Now That She Knows

I wonder if now that Holiday knows about this blog and about us if our friendship will change? She’s another friend I didn’t tell about the DID. I also didn’t tell Lady about it or Psycho Date chick. It’s easier to tell someone I’m a survivor because the vast majority of women this day and age are, more men are coming forward as well. Heck, I’m okay with 3-D people knowing most things about me. I’m open about the OCD. I don’t hesitate to tell people they can’t use my restroom. I told Holiday last night that I wouldn’t be able to call her today because it’s a therapy day and I’ll most likely be messed up. Her sweet reply? “I’ll be your therapist.” I appreciate it when friends step up like that but it scares the crap out of me when they walk into my mind, my blog. These are people I have to look at, people that are going to know I barely make it through each day. I think she understand depression. I think she understands being lonely and many other issues I have but worry she’ll be afraid of the DID thing. Will she make fun of me with that age old joke, “Which one of you did that?” followed by laughter? Will I be the butt of too many jokes? This worries me now. And truthfully, since I know she’s reading I can go ahead and say this. Now you know. I hadn’t planned on telling you because many times telling has gone badly for me. I don’t appreciate the jokes about going Sybil or “Three Eve”. I don’t appreciate being handled with kid gloves. I’d like for nothing at all to change but I tell ya, I worry it will. Maybe you realized when we first met there was something a little “different” about me. Maybe like UK you picked up the multiple personality disorder and I don’t hide it as well as I use to. I hope that switching while dancing with Sis wasn’t offensive.

Continue reading ‘Now That She Knows’

Hair Despair Conspiracy Theory

You think you know people. You call them a friend then they go behind your back and register you for a product designed for people with bad hair. There I was on my computer whistling innocent tune (dee, dee, dee, dee, dee) and what happens? I get an email from someone I thought was a friend. They sent me an email telling me they are aware of my “hair despair” and that they’d like to help. Let me just go ahead and quote this email okay.

Hey there!

You have a friend who cares. (Enter friend’s name) is well aware of your hair despair. It’s time to get hairapy and actually do something about that ‘do!

No matter what problem your hair may have, (enter friend’s name) wants you to know that Sunsilk is here to help and has the solution. Learn about our hair care products and get your free sample at gethairapy.com. Then be sure to thank your friend for putting you on the path to beautiful hair.

Sincerely,
Sunsilk

SunSilk Hair Therapy

I was in such despair I could no longer whistle. My “friend” was not able to keep my secret. She had to go and put me on a website for people who suffer with bad hair. Now everyone knows my problem. She can’t keep a secret and I, well, I can’t whistle a happy tune knowing this Sunsilk intervention is set in motion despite me being perfectly satisfied going about in hairy denial. I’ve tried to whistle again. I followed the age old instructions, “Just put your lips together and blow” but I don’t know if I have the wind in me left. I may never whistle again.

If it’s not bad enough that one friend decided I needed hair therapy another actually went out and purchased this item for me. Is this some sort of hairy conspiracy? The other “friend” said they were free samples …talkin’ ’bout she some extras…..and she thought she’d share them with me. Now I know the truth.

Hair Despair Conspiracy Theory
Monday, September 24, 2007-2:21AM EST