Sometimes Dr. D looks at my work and says, “This is disturbing”.
So I say, “Thank you.”
I’m more intrigued than disturbed. I notice all the commotion in each piece. Even though people are crammed together they’re not connected, they’re having their own experience….and so it goes with Dissociative Identity Disorder. Each has his own view of what’s going on. Some are more in touch with ‘reality’ than others, but all feel disconnected, separate.
I feel like when I walk outside people can see I’m trying to keep myself in the here and now. I think they can see on my face that I’m fractured
At times it feels as though there’s a swoosh of air that passes over my head, forcing it to bow. I hold it in my hands and rock. The more i rock the further away I get from the here and now, but part of it feels good, to just hide my face and rock back and forth. I close my eyes, block everyone out and rock. I can’t stay that way too long…..