I went to bed around 7am Tuesday morning and woke at 12 noon to meet with Betty. I took a quick lavender shower and was out the door. She was tired, I was tired but we got our stuff done and came home.

Within min of walking in the door my body started this horrible spasming. Every muscle, groin area included, tightened, let go, tightened and let go. I’d compare it to the strong contractions of child-birth only for hours upon hours and the contraction going from the shoulders to the toes. My toes spasmed a locked. I’d maneuver them straight but a few minutes later they’d do it again.

I realized I was in trouble bc it wasn’t stopping. Charlie horse – like spasms in my thighs, squeezing in my calves, my fingers curled and locked and the muscles in my lower back rippled with spasms – simultaneously. I was writhing and needed a human voice so I called an elder from the Kingdom Hall who was very nice. I talked to him and his wife for less than 10 min bc I was so tired.

People don’t always say the right thing. He told me that he knows my Lupus will get a lot worse. He said, its attacking your body. I said yes. We talked about how my current understanding is that the RSD is linked to my Lupus. Strangely enough, answering questions and talking for about 10 min helped. Despite the ‘it’s going to get worse’ statement to which my mind replied, I won’t live, it was a helpful phone call. I slept shortly after the phone call.

Around 11:30pm a call came in from Seattle from a girl I’ve known since 2000. She’s come to visit me twice :-). I was drunk with exhaustion so I only managed a few minutes of chat. I love that girl.

The day was difficult but with the help of friends I got through it in one piece. I realized early on that I needed to hear a human voice to help me through this. Right now I’m spent and have a headache but I feel confident I can keep going.

My best furry friend, Mary Jane, snuggled close to my ear and purred.

I’m going to go back to sleep.


01/04/17 – 4:10amEST

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