I can’t remember the last time I slept so long, still I crumple my hand over my face with high anxiety. I keep cupping my mouth and nose with my hands teepee-style. My eyes dart around the room as if I’m looking for somewhere to go, yet I feel better than I have in days.
My shoulders tingle with anxiety and pain. I place my hand open palm on the center of my chest and rock. I can feel tears want to come, but they don’t. I feel wild. I feel better than I have in days, yet everything I just described I’ve done since I started trying to write this entry, who knows how long ago.
I turn my head to the left as if something will be there to fall into. I just stare. I all but stare a hole in the screen typing out a few words to say, I didn’t accomplish everything I needed to get done, but this week end wasn’t a total waste. I finished the Hope Cat, photographed her, cut the image into four detailed pieces then posted her on Etsy. She’s got a little tail and everything. There was so much more work to be done but I’ll accept the cat and be happy that I got restorative sleep. I slept. I really slept.
Monday starts again with doctor madness but that’s hours from now. I still have hours left of this day to let my head settle. I’m ok. I’ll be okay.