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Anxiety Art therapy Chronic Pain I'm only human Lupus Multiple Personality Disorder PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

The Benign

The Benign. Betty / Mom and I discovered we have the same sewing basket. Though she didn’t give birth to me, we have so much in common. At the Kingdom Hall I go lay down in another room if I’m unable to sit through the entire meeting. Last Thursday I was snoring. I was told […]

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Anxiety Chronic Pain I'm only human Lupus Multiple Personality Disorder PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Stress and Hope

The Stress Self control. I seem to be losing it. Even when I’m left alone I feel myself raging. I’ve been seeing things out of the corner of my eye that isn’t there. The people behind my eyes keep talking. During PT, Buttons was  working on my neck while l laid on the bed.  I had […]

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Anxiety The People Behind My Eyes

Dream: Cousins and Shaquille O’neal

For the most part this makes me laugh because of the randomness of Shaq and the one crazy girl who started it all. If the dream had a name it would be called ‘Faith Doesn’t Live Here Anymore’. In general I immediately write down the dream when I wake. I’ve done the same with this […]

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Anxiety Digital Art Lupus Major Depression PTSD Surreal The People Behind My Eyes

Prednisone rage. Steroid psychosis. Self Talk. Time.

I am the same person who wrote the entry about my best furry bud being sweet when she sleeps. She’s my buddy and I love her a lot but her mom has some problems. Prednisone rage, steroid psychosis, paranoia, deep depression, suicidal ideation and moods that swing more than the 70’s love festivals. I have […]

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Anxiety The People Behind My Eyes

Self Talk – Confrontation and Small Potatoes

Issue: A formal letter of complaint was written and mailed to the property owner concerning the property manager. Action: A bit of self talk is needed to get myself to focus on the issue and how to best deal with it. It’s a pep talk and reality check and a helpful way to organize my […]

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Abuse Anxiety Art therapy Artists Thoughts Lupus Major Depression Multiple Personality Disorder Originals Paintings PTSD

Art Therapy in the Etsy Shop

I paint with my heart and all but bleed on canvas. Painting is a powerful way to release anxiety and thoughts that pound my skull. While art as a whole is therapeutic for me, there are certain pieces that were created specifically as therapy with my psychologist. As I thin out the amount of art […]

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Anxiety Chronic Pain Digital Art Lupus Major Depression PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

From Under Guard to Fresh Air

I feel as if my home is a beautiful prison with great ambiance, great food and excellent, choice teas. The stairs outside in the hallway are armed guards. One mistep and the guards fire at will. I sometimes manager pain better than other times. My mood makes these times different. The season makes a difference, […]

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Anxiety Creative Writing Major Depression Multiple Personality Disorder PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

To sleep with a quiet mind

I find writings and paintings all the time that another personality has created. Recently I’ve not seen too many art pieces but I have seen scribbled writings posted on the corkboard, and here on the blog. I know there’s been night activity by a younger alter because I’ve awakened twice in a weeks time now […]

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Abstract Art Acrylic on Paper Anxiety ART GALLERY Experimental design Lupus Major Depression Mixed Media Originals Paintings Paper PTSD

Landfall Abstract Ocean Scene

This entry shows art two art pieces with a purpose. Rise, fall if I must. Stand to meet the challenge. What’s the challenge? I’ve got to get a hold of my stinking thinking. I have to change my outlook one single color at a time if necessary. While writing I felt a sense of urgency […]

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Anxiety Digital Art Lupus Major Depression The People Behind My Eyes Therapy Review

Therapy Review: On a scale of one to ten

Eight. I’m sitting on 8 after having been at a 9 for a few days. That’s the level of depression and suicidality I discussed today with my therapist Dr. D and my psychiatrist Dr. M. The depression stems from the pain but it’s a deep seeded depression. I was at the sink the other day […]