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Abstract Art Anxiety Art therapy Lupus The People Behind My Eyes

Anxiety. What if Painting

Of course my head has been everywhere. I don’t feel good at all and the pain of this is constant. At first I thought, it’s just more pain, something I can ignore. I still think that but this is a new pain so I worry about not knowing what the pain means. Is my stomach […]

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Anxiety I'm only human Lupus PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Perimenopause and clotting. Blood thinner realities.

Content: Very personal entry. Perhaps not for the squeamish. Talk of blood and blood clots as well as being on a blood thinner during the cycle. I’m struggling physically. I thought I was going to the hospital last night. I didn’t go because I thought to myself, I just can’t do the battery of tests […]

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Chronic Pain Lupus PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Victory Laps and Wobbly Steps

That’s joy on my face. Walking brings joy to my face. I did 125 feet today. Another goal met was to begin giving myself the Arixtra blood thinner shot, which I take once daily. Next week we will work on stamina issues. I’ll begin learning to balance myself climbing the stairs. I’m going to need […]

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Chronic Pain I'm only human Lupus PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

On fear and focus

July 8th I’ll be discharged from the nursing home whether I have an apartment or not. Here’s a shot of me holding my bears. I worry about my lack of stamina and how it will prevent me from getting basic needs met. I’m not whole, not ready to be discharged to care for myself. How […]

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Chronic Pain Lupus The People Behind My Eyes

A Thousand Miles

I wasn’t nearly as afraid when I was in the thick of it. I knew what was stacked against me. I understood the odds were not in my favor yet I didn’t constantly think about dying. I knew I wanted to live. Once I realized I may lose as much as both legs I tried […]

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Lupus PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Surviving Triggers

I was shaking from head to toe. I couldn’t think. I was naked, in the shower with a nurses aid standing beside me. A black woman was touching me! I might as well have been a child with my mother in the shower, that’s why I was shaking. It didn’t matter that the CNA was […]

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Creative Writing I'm only human Life is like a box of The People Behind My Eyes Women

Interview with Myself

I need a blog entry so I’ve decided to interview myself. The questions and answers are off the top of my head. I’ll do 5 questions. Question: Faith, what have you done this week to improve your quality of life? Answer: Wow. That’s tough. Off the top of my head I’d say I have worked […]