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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Digital Art Lupus PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Eye to Eye – Self Image. Friends

As I finished an image for My Face My Art a cruel voice in my head reminded me that I’m worthless. My gut felt heavy. I wanted to curl in the fetal position and face the wall with my back to everything; anything that might be damaged by my existence. If this feeling could be weighed, […]

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Acrylic and Ink Art Originals Paper Sketchbook diary The People Behind My Eyes

Eye to Eye – Never a Secret

Right now I have Grace’s face in front of mine like a self portrait. Her eyes are even with mine. She looks me in the face with confidence I didn’t get to see grow. I don’t even know how much time has passed because time means nothing to me. I think of Grace quite often. […]

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Anxiety Art Sketchbook diary The People Behind My Eyes

Knotted

Anxiety is still high. My stomach is in knots. Faith

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Acrylic and Ink Art Faces Flowers Originals Paintings Paper PTSD Sketchbook diary Surreal The People Behind My Eyes Visionary

On the Easel : Madness in Color. Black Butterfly.

This is some of the art I’m working on. It’s art on paper, of course. One – watercolor and acrylic. She is wild and Untamed. Two – watercolor and acrylic. I’ve lost my way on this one so it hangs waiting for the aha moment. “Black Butterfly” –  I’d never seen a black butterfly until […]

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Abuse Multiple Personality Disorder Originals Paintings Paper PTSD The People Behind My Eyes Therapy Review

Therapy Review: Anger. Free Will.

We talked over the phone and tears streamed down my face. As I reached for a Kleenex a flash of a woman who had tears like flowers, flashed in my mind. She had no color. I couldn’t even see her lips or nose, just a thin black line in the shape of her eyes with […]

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Artists Thoughts Life is like a box of POETRY Tree Art

I Touched the Trees

I’ve been once again drawing trees obsessively. Before girl’s night with pizza and a movie, I cut out of here for a nature walk to the park. There were a few families there, separate from one another and weary of each other. There was an uneasiness I refused to be part of. I was there […]

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Abuse PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Normal Doesn’t Live Here

I’m having company around 8 pm, girl’s night, a last minute arrangement. I’m tired and part of me feels like it’ll be stimulation overload but I could use a bit of entertainment. Before that happens I need to purge for clarity. I need to write a few things to get them out of my head […]

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Anxiety Multiple Personality Disorder PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

In and out of my head

I can guess at why I’m in and out of my head right now with a lot of dissociation going on. There’s a lot going on in therapy,  a lot of anxiety and a few days of high pain. I want to get around to read other blogs but it doesn’t happen. I start off doing […]

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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Chronic Pain I'm only human The People Behind My Eyes

I see myself fall apart

5:08 pm EST I’m lost in this, trying to get out of my skin. This hurts so bad and I’m scared. I hate this!! Father! I’ve been hitting 9’s since Sunday. It’s not immediate, it’s a gradual rise as I move around, as the air hits me or I move my head and my hair […]

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Abstract Art Art Expressionsim Mixed Media Originals Paintings

Room Divider Art Display and My Own Infomercial

So you have a room divider meant for family photos but you’d rather do something artsy with it, try filling the spaces with original art. In my room divider I’ve added such original works as the encaustic mixed media painting called “Fall Tree“. Beautiful blues are displayed acrylic painting in “Abstract Waves“. I’ve also showcased […]