I’ve been struggling emotionally since the GYN appointment. It was a bit much for me. Sleep has been rough and anxiety has been really high. I’m kind of struggling a bit. We talked about continuing deep breathing and lavender for anxiety relief. We also talked about the anxiety that comes with this CNA just up […]
Tag: ptsd
I just woke from screaming “No!” in the dream where I wasn’t being attacked or physically abused. In the dream I was staying with friends in their home. My mother was staying there, too. The only thing I got to keep of my things after the move were dolls, the clothes on my back and […]
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Curve Ball
Back when I was in the hospital I contacted three family members to let them know I was ill. Then six months after, I contacted one of them again, with no response. My sister responded by saying she didn’t care if I lived or died. Two years have passed since the hospitalization with no word […]
I go from sleepless nights to straight fatigue with an undercurrent of panic and impatience. I’ve vomited and stressed myself right into an outbreak all over my chest. I can’t get Benadryl until April 1st. Man. I’ve got a doctor’s appointment the 30th of this month. I wish I could cancel. I’ve got to calm […]
I started this painting a few years ago but just couldn’t get it so I used gesso and removed everything I want to change. I’ve put the painting on the easel and will turn it and look at it from all angles for the next few days. This will help me to know which direction […]
I never know when I’m going to feel well enough to get out of bed. Three days in and I wondered if there would be a fourth, but today I feel halfway normal. Usually I don’t know if I’m going to be able to stand being alive because the pain is so bad, but then […]
The Invisible Children is a haunting and surreal scene of sunflowers at night, a full moon, ravens flying and figures in the flowers at the base of a large, bare tree. It is a dark, fluid piece, full of small details. Art Title: The Invisible ChildrenArt by: Faith Magdalene AustinMedia: Acrylic paint, ink, paperSize: 5.5 […]
Content – Verbal abuse account. Emotional. Anxiety. Mention of physical abuse. Therapy was hard. At 48 years old I’m still not over the abuse. When I said this to Dr D. he commented that the abuse was extreme and for a very long time. It makes me want to cry. I’ve been running from this […]
Content – Physical abuse. Emotional abuse. My dreams have ranged from strange to emotional to terrifying. Last night I had a dream I lost my identity but was assisted by a stranger to get it back. When I was handed papers that confirmed what I was saying all along, I am in fact Faith Austin, […]
Content – Talk of suicidal feelings surrounding Chronic Relex Sympathetic Dystrophy (CRSD), some hopelessness, hope art and talk of anniversary dates. We talked about how hopeless it feels to walk into the ER believing it’s a source of relief only to be told that there’s a crisis out there that has nothing to do with […]