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Abuse Anxiety Multiple Personality Disorder PTSD Siblings abused The People Behind My Eyes

Abandonment Trigger Reality. Resolution. Goals.

Yesterday when the CNA got nasty and then walked out of the house it struck me so deeply. I couldn’t help but cry and say enough! Forget letting them come back for three more days. I fired them right then and there. The young lady said that most blacks are ignorant and poor. My objection didn’t […]

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Abuse Art Art therapy Artists Thoughts Black Children Lupus Multiple Personality Disorder Originals Paper PTSD Self Portrait Sketchbook diary Sunflowers Surreal The People Behind My Eyes

Half a Century More

I started this little painting back in October of last year but I just now finished it. It looks so much better in person than the terrible photograph. This 7×10 watercolor piece has a lot of numbers on it. The numbers are ages that were very significant to me with age 47 being the last […]

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Multiple Personality Disorder PTSD The People Behind My Eyes Therapy Review

The African Elephant

I look just like her. I laugh like her and I hear her voice when I speak. Wow. I swore I’d never be anything like her, but here I am nearly 50 years old and I’m physically a miniature version of my mother. I’m ok with it because not everything about this woman I called […]

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Anxiety Multiple Personality Disorder PTSD The People Behind My Eyes Therapy Review

CNA Chronicles : Young CNA Fired. Dissociation.

I hated to do it but I had to fire my 19 year old CNA for habitual failure to wear her mask and wash her hands. I talked to Dr D before I fired her and explained that I was worried I’d not get care for days on end if I fired her but I’ve […]

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Abuse Dreams Multiple Personality Disorder PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

The unwelcome child

I just woke from screaming “No!” in the dream where I wasn’t being attacked or physically abused. In the dream I was staying with friends in their home. My mother was staying there, too. The only thing I got to keep of my things after the move were dolls, the clothes on my back and […]

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Art Art therapy Artists Thoughts Black Children Children Mixed Media Multiple Personality Disorder Originals Paintings PTSD Sunflowers

Tiny Art. Safe Art.

Sometimes I paint on a tiny little canvas because it feels less overwhelming and very doable. Larger canvas is hard to manage so I don’t mess with that at all but even at times an 8 x 10 piece of paper is daunting, so I pull out a small little canvas and let my mind […]

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Art ART GALLERY Art therapy Digital Art Multiple Personality Disorder

A Look Back at Art Projects

I’ve been updating the galleries here on Sundrip and ran across some art pieces I’ve not seen in a little bit. I thought I’d share some of them with you. Honorable is an art piece that started all the art therapy pieces. I can even remember the assignment and who gave it. I look at […]

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Art Art therapy Artists Thoughts Faces Multiple Personality Disorder Originals PTSD Sketchbook diary The People Behind My Eyes

Risk. Be More

Dr. D and I discussed the possibility of me painting almost daily at set times. This would allow me to know ahead of time what to expect. I need set times for things as well as lists to feel more control over my environment and situation. Setting a specific time to paint and doing it […]

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Abuse Chronic Pain Lupus Multiple Personality Disorder PTSD The People Behind My Eyes Therapy Review

Woes

Content : Suicide discussion. Physical updates. Flashbacks of abuse. Abuse. The nurse will be here tomorrow. I’ve fallen 3x in a week so things are a bit messy right now. I’ve been told I pushed too hard, tried to do too much. I’ll see Dr D tomorrow as well. He is concerned about what he […]

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Abuse Dreams Major Depression Multiple Personality Disorder PTSD Siblings abused The People Behind My Eyes Therapy Review

Therapy Review : Dreams. Hallucinations.

Content – Extreme physical abuse, siblings abused, emotional abuse We talked about the dream I had where my mother beat my sister without mercy. It was brutal. She did so in a separate room from me, my cousin and 2 aunts. It was so bad and went on so long that I risked myself by […]