I decided to draw a little line drawing with my funky triple lead colored pencils to depict all those "what if" roads I've been going down. It's not a great photo but the idea is there. It's a drawing of roads going everywhere, fast.
What if I die in my sleep? What if I only get a few months more? What if the doctor is wrong and they somehow save me again? What if I live with this and Lupus for a really long time? What if I defy the odds, again? What if I don't?
All what if roads lead to nowhere. I figure when I start obsessing again that I'll pull out the paints or pencils and do a "what if" line drawing. This is my second. It's helpful to put it on paper and get it out of my head.
Title: Sunflower Visions Art by: Faith Magdalene Austin Medium: Watercolor and colored pencil on watercolor paper Size: 9 x 10 inches, Finish: Signed, dated, unmounted Style: Surreal, Abstract,
Art details: Sunburst, faces, swirls, eyes and hands reaching out are just part of what you'll see in this colorful, jam packed art piece. Lively orange, vivid purple, lime and sage green glow beside sunflower yellow. This is a visual feast, a mindscape, a surreal watercolor art piece.
"Sunflower Visions" and other original art can be found in my Etsy shop at www.sundrip.etsy.com. You may also contact me for a PayPal invoice.
Title: Wild Things Art by: Faith Magdalene Austin Medium: Acrylic collage on heavy cardstock Size: 9x12 inches, Finish: Sealed, signed, dated, unmounted Style: Collage, Surreal, Abstract Figurative, raw
Art details: Cut outs of my own art have been arranged to create "Wild Things." Sunflowers, koi fish, African faces, Asian faces and more have been mixed together in a wild collage. This is a visual feast, a mindscape, surreal art piece.
"Wild Things" and other original art can be found in my Etsy shop at www.sundrip.etsy.com. You may also contact me for a PayPal invoice.
These pieces were worked on in the last two weeks. There's been a lot of art lately but hardly any of it has hit the internet. I'm falling behind on it, however, today there are a few to show.
They're all four different from one another. Creating them was quite emotional, especially the last piece when Robert spoke with Dr. D about some difficulties he was having.
The black and white mask is also by Robert. The other two are by Michelle. All are created in watercolor. The last one has crayon as well.
Today in therapy we talked about how difficult it can be to sit here with our CNA day after day and not have her know a thing about our DID. Today two of our snails died just before the CNA arrived which means we had to just swallow it down and not think about it. That's difficult for a kid who just lost her pet. It can be difficult for me, Jordan, to stay out for 6 hours, 6 days a week but so far it's happened. So far we've kept our secret.
Monday was one of the hardest days I've had in a while. It started off with nightmares that stayed with me for much of the day. I tried to go back to bed to start over but had yet another nightmare. Then as planned, I got myself together, got on my horse (wheelchair) and left the house despite mega pain. I went to the shoe store and cried my eyes out in the store unexpectedly. I had no idea the grief would hit me right there in DSW but it did and there I sat crying in my chair in front of people. I felt like a fool.
Later I went to the post office to send out art only to discover that it was Columbus Day, no mail. That would have been fine except I was already at my max of stress and physical pain. Then later the big worry happened, I fell. ...continue reading "Surviving to Eke out Gratitude"
Here's a quick look at some of the art that is still looking for a wall of it's own.
The Young Violinist
Resilience Tree – Risen
Where can I purchase original Sundrip art?
Original artwork can be purchased directly from this website Sundrip.com by using PayPal or from my Etsy shop. The Etsy shop no longer offers prints.
Where can I buy Sundrip prints?
You may purchase prints from my Redbubble shop. If there's a print you want but it does not appear in the Redbubble shop please contact me and I'll put it in there. At this time I only offer prints from my Redbubble shop.
Please click the Galleries link for Frequently Asked Questions and other information.
Thank you for visiting SUNDRIP - Art for Life
The first CNA they sent me didn't work out. I'm not sure what the company was thinking. Here's the text sent to a friend who is still in the nursing home dealing with CNA's, nurses and roommates from hell.
"Oh Lord! My new CNA is 70 years old. I was like, what? Who sends a 70 year old woman to help a person in a wheelchair? It's her job so I'm not holding back. I have her act as my legs. I like her but I have a feeling she'll quit by winter. She says the laundry room from my apartment is too far to walk and the trash cans are so far they might as well be in a different zip code. lol My thought? Stop being a CNA BEFORE the age of 70 or don't complain about the distance you've got to walk. 70! They can't be serious. Thank goodness I know CPR. I may have to do it on her aged self after she gets back from the trash.
Update: They're sending me a younger CNA Monday morning, 8 am. We'll see how that goes. lol. The 70 yr old CNA and I talked frankly about her inability to handle my case. Crazy to send her to me."
You know what I always worry about? How will she feel about seeing my little nub, the amputation site? Will she be grossed out? Is it ugly to her? Am I ugly to her? The thought now is, it's not ugly, it just is what it is, but it's not ugly. I'm not ugly because I've had an amputation. Slowly, I've gone from ashamed of the amputation to 'just' being a bit self conscious. Lets hope that a CNA is used to seeing such things because I have such things. Then again, I'd hate to whip it out - Bamb! - then have her pass out on my floor. ...continue reading "CNA and Self Confidence"