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Abuse Anxiety Dreams Lupus PTSD Siblings abused The People Behind My Eyes

Dreams

Content – Physical abuse. Emotional abuse. My dreams have ranged from strange to emotional to terrifying. Last night I had a dream I lost my identity but was assisted by a stranger to get it back. When I was handed papers that confirmed what I was saying all along, I am in fact Faith Austin, […]

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Art Artists Thoughts Life is like a box of

It’s here and I love it

I couldn’t be happier. I love the table. I got it from Amazon.com. I can roll my wheelchair right up to it and roll around the art studio getting supplies and fresh water and wine. I painted for two hours which is about what I’ve been doing for a little bit. It feels great. Pretend […]

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Anxiety The People Behind My Eyes

Cracks and Judgements

The CNA is was different today. There were cracks in the peace here. She was touchy, sensitive. I was messing with her and put a leaf that fell off my plant in the middle of the table where she sits. She said it wasn’t funny and proceeded to tell me to be nice and how […]

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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Artists Thoughts Chronic Pain Lupus Self Portrait The People Behind My Eyes

Therapy Review : Acceptance. Art Flame

Content : Brief suicide check in. Explaining myself, memories. Acceptance. Pain. So I walked into the building and my pain level rose to a nine out of ten. From the knee down on both sides it hurt like all get out. I told Dr D that I worry I eventually won’t be able to walk […]

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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Chronic Pain The People Behind My Eyes

Relaxing With Joey

This boy has been snuggly all day. I just love it, but he’s got to get off my chest soon because he weighs 11 pounds and feels quite heavy on my chest. It’s great when he’s on my legs though. That’s helpful, so is oxygen, which I’m fighting for right now. Lol One of the […]

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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Chronic Pain Lupus The People Behind My Eyes

All Flare ups End

I have to remember that all flare ups end. It feels like they won’t but it will. It takes time I feel like I don’t have to give. The pain is intense. If I put pressure on the foot it starts to burn like I dipped it in fire, but it stops burning within minutes. […]

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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Anxiety Lupus PTSD The People Behind My Eyes Therapy Review

Therapy Review : Suicide Disease. Hope Art.

Content – Talk of suicidal feelings surrounding Chronic Relex Sympathetic Dystrophy (CRSD), some hopelessness, hope art and talk of anniversary dates. We talked about how hopeless it feels to walk into the ER believing it’s a source of relief only to be told that there’s a crisis out there that has nothing to do with […]

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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Chronic Pain Lupus The People Behind My Eyes

The Pointless ER Visit

Well then, I guess even the ER is refusing real pain therapies to people with documented Lupus and Chronic Regional Sympathetic Dystrophy (CRSD). I showed up at a sustained level 9 pain with my foot and leg messed up only to be given a line of crap and some Tylenol. Uh huh, Tylenol! I cried. […]

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Art

Darn Foot

It’s been awhile since I had more than pain going on with the foot. Last night I hurt so badly I sure thought I was going to the hospital! The difficulty is that it is swollen 3x it’s normal size and is split open. It hurts more than I can say and yet the doctor […]

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African-American Rag Doll Art Black Children Originals Rag Doll

Annette the African American Bag Holder Rag Doll

I’m happy to have finished her. It feels really good. Here she is in her handmade dress which is upcycled from a handmade Indian blouse with beautiful beaded details in red, gold and blue. Annette is approximately 35 inches long. Her hair is made of beautiful, textured yarn that looks great in a ponytail or […]