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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Chronic Pain Lupus The People Behind My Eyes

All Flair ups End

I have to remember that all flair ups end. It feels like they won’t but it will. It takes time I feel like I don’t have to give. The pain is intense. If I put pressure on the foot it starts to burn like I dipped it in fire, but it stops burning within minutes. […]

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Art

Darn Foot

It’s been awhile since I had more than pain going on with the foot. Last night I hurt so badly I sure thought I was going to the hospital! The difficulty is that it is swollen 3x it’s normal size and is split open. It hurts more than I can say and yet the doctor […]

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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy The People Behind My Eyes

Positive Doctors

My Oncologist /Hematologist is such a positive doctor. Today he again told me I’m a walking miracle and that I should not worry about the future. He said to keep taking the medications, keep my appointments and move forward. He said if it happens again we’ll deal with it. He explained what the doctors would […]

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Chronic Pain I'm only human Lupus PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Show of Strength

The problem with being told I’m strong is that it seems to give onlookers permission to let me be, do little, and go on as usual. I hate being told I’m strong because of all the hidden messages with it. My doctor and I had conversation where I was asked if I really wanted to […]

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Anxiety Chronic Pain Lupus PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Sunflowers for the Weary

A friend of mine came over and brought fried chicken and a bouquet of sunflowers. It was too sweet. We sat and talked while I ate. I was hesitant to talk about health stuff because I didn’t want to depress her. It was a very nice visit though. Yesterday after I blogged, I went ahead […]

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Anxiety I'm only human Lupus PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

The Same Road

I saw the surgeon today. He didn’t smile much at first. I always try to read him when I go in. I asked if he had bad news. I said, am I going to have to do that fight again, another excruciating, painful time? He said yes. I said, you could have given that news […]

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Art

Back to CBD

I’ve been so sick that I’ve not been eating much. I’ve wasted a lot of food because I was in too much pain and didn’t want eat, and it spoiled. So I made a decision, take the wasted grocery money and buy CBD oil again. I hadn’t been able to afford it at $50 for […]

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Anxiety Chronic Pain Lupus PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Shoes and Pride

I went to the store today to purchase cat food for Joseph when I decided to stop by the shoe section to see if I could find something I like. It was suggested by friends and my nurse that I try buying 2 different sizes, one for the full foot, one size for the amputated […]

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Cats Chronic Pain I'm only human Lupus Major Depression The People Behind My Eyes

Joey

He’s a chatter box kitty but as sweet as can be. He sleeps on my chest and purrs. He gives me little cat kisses. This is my new buddy Joey. Joey is a tabby male, neutered and 9 yrs old. He’s calm and friendly to visitors. He doesn’t know a stranger. He’s got big, bright […]

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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Chronic Pain Lupus PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Where?

Where are my coping skills? Where is my ability to handle my health issues? I wish I could say I am emotionally better than the last time I was in the hospital but I’m not. I’m just as shocked and stunned asking, is this really my life? Seriously, they were going to take the rest […]