Flowers – Page 4 – Faith Magdalene's Sundrip

I Can Keep Going.

Posted on January 2, 2019March 20, 2022 by F.Magdalene

I Can Keep Going was drawn by Robert (19) with writing by Michelle (12).

What stands out in this piece for me is the brick wall on the shoulders of the largest figure. We are feeling a lot of pressure right now.

I like how Michelle processes things: This is how I feel. This is the reality. This is supporting truth.

I’ve not been suicidal but life has felt like a burden, emotionally and physically painful. Several factors played into not getting enough sleep so that was a problem, too. Each day is a struggle that feels like a losing battle but the reality is I’ve made progress and I’m moving forward in many healthier ways. I slip up, like the other day with self harm, but I also put in place safety plans and try to find ways to help myself. Lavender in the nose and on my feet has helped tremendously, so has the art sketchbook. It feels like a losing battle but it is not. I know I can keep going, and I will.

The art piece was created in watercolor and is 7.5 x 10 inches on 98lb paper.

Robert

The Grumpy CNA

Posted on January 2, 2019March 20, 2022 by F.Magdalene

Content: Suicide. Blood. Emotional angst.

Cruel Words was painted by several of us. What strikes me is how affected I was by the suicide of the CNA’s friend.

In the drawing there are heads blown off the people in the trees. That’s a first for drawings and hopefully the last. I know the kids inside were very affected by the suicide. Having her cry in our arms that way was very heavy.

I fired my regular CNA who had cruel words for me. Anxiety is already high for us, we don’t need to worry about the mouth of our CNA and what she will say that’ll hurt.

The grumpy CNA is pregnant with three weeks left. It is entirely possible that her change of attitude is purely hormonal, however, the irritability and weariness she caused couldn’t be tolerated. It is also true that I can’t justify asking an 8 month pregnant woman to lift my wheelchair and take me to the doctor. I feel horrible asking her to do my laundry or run the sweeper. The girl is tired and irritable! Dang!!!

I like her but the change in her isn’t safe for my personal issues, ya know? I talked to her about why I fired her and she said she knows she’s hormonal and understands. I even told her it’s about time to take maternity leave because she can’t be at my house when her water breaks. lol. I can’t handle that. I don’t know nothin about birthin no babies.

Firing my CNA was the right thing to do. I was walking on eggshells in my own home and that can’t be. So, on to the next chapter in the CNA Saga.

The art piece was created in watercolor and is 7.5 x 10 inches on 98 lb paper.

Robert

Sketchbook Pages: Uprooted

Posted on December 19, 2018March 20, 2022 by F.Magdalene

I feel uprooted. Everything is different. My home is great but I’ve not laid down roots here. Most of my possessions are new because the old got thrown out. The only photo of my father that I had was thrown away accidentally. It is gone forever and it hurts.

My dishes, terrariums, plants, shoes, bed, sheets, furniture, everything is different and new. My frogs are new, fish are new. No dog or cat anymore. Heck, my laptop and phone are even new. I realized I have few things that I am emotionally attached to because I’ve not had them long enough. It feels like everything has new roots, nothing is stable, consistent, long term, dependable.Â

I’m new. I’ve changed physically and emotionally. My eyes haven’t stopped watering since the amputation. They water nearly non-stop.Â

I feel like I’m complaining but all I’m trying to say is that laying down new roots at 47 is difficult.

Art supplies are new. Again, these are observations not necessarily complaints. I love my new art supplies, especially the Winsor and Newton watercolors seen in the photos. Winsor Newton puts out a superior product that I totally love and yet there’s a feeling of sadness because they don’t have longer history with me. It would seem their only history with me is the hospitalization.Â

It hurts my heart to think that what all the new things have in common is trauma. So I’ve got to try and change that view to one more positive, something like this: All the new things are associated with SURVIVAL not near death. They are evidence of life, of a future, of deep, deep roots that helped me walk to this very day.Â

Jordan

Painting Feelings

Posted on December 8, 2018March 20, 2022 by F.Magdalene

In the hospital I felt guilty for putting my friends through worry for me. I felt bad that they worried for five long months, especially around surgeries. When things would get harry I felt horrible for putting people through tears and worry.

In this art piece that expresses the guilt, I put hanging people on the shoulders of a figure standing behind a smaller faceless figure. Both figures have an amputated foot with darkened skin around the amputation site. The figure with the sunflower crown is holding a star in her left hand.Â

In the hospital I worried that the doctors would realize that they were putting forth a lot of effort for a nobody, and when they found out they’d stop caring for me. This piece expresses the issue of low self worth.Â

The painting shows a split face which is typical in my art anymore. It shows two faceless figures and a large sunflower at the bottom. Also of note is the yellow hair and orange face of the faceless figure with spike hair. Again, yellow symbolizes disgusting things and there were plenty of gross things in the hospital. For her hair to be yellow is very significant for me.Â

Both works were created after the amputation and are in watercolor and ink.Â

The painting above, where I express myself as No One is interesting to me since I had an alter named No One who always painted herself as faceless. That alter changed her name to Jordan and is interestingly enough, the main personality in the group. She is in affect, my face.Â

The No One painting is also the inspiration for art where there are two faces as opposed to just a split face. I’ve been doing that in art therapy a lot lately. Dr. D and I talked about that last Friday.Â

Faith

Surviving to Eke out Gratitude

Posted on October 10, 2018March 20, 2022 by F.Magdalene

Monday was one of the hardest days I’ve had in a while. It started off with nightmares that stayed with me for much of the day. I tried to go back to bed to start over but had yet another nightmare. Then as planned, I got myself together, got on my horse (wheelchair) and left the house despite mega pain. I went to the shoe store and cried my eyes out in the store unexpectedly. I had no idea the grief would hit me right there in DSW but it did and there I sat crying in my chair in front of people. I felt like a fool.

Later I went to the post office to send out art only to discover that it was Columbus Day, no mail. That would have been fine except I was already at my max of stress and physical pain. Then later the big worry happened, I fell. Continue reading “Surviving to Eke out Gratitude”

Journal Work in Progress

Posted on August 17, 2018March 20, 2022 by F.Magdalene

Journaling until I’m blue in the face. Work in progress.

“Someone Else” in watercolor and acrylic. All work shown is on 8.5 x 5.5 paper.

“Froggie Smiles”.Â These are photographs. I’m looking forward to scanning so these look right. This is much darker than the actual painting. I’m working on the details of all these pieces. Once I have the colors in mind it doesn’t take long to finish.

This last one was created for the sole purpose of testing out new paints. It’s a paint pallet sheet. Sometimes when I just need to draw but there’s nothing specific to do, I draw lines on paper this way and wait to use it later to test paint or clean brushes.

Faith

Three Birds

Posted on August 16, 2018March 20, 2022 by F.Magdalene

Fifteen days total but halfway through I began to lose myself to the constant and extreme pain. My medication cocktail sometimes caused me to see dragons and aliens. I’d been in intensive care for the bilateral pulmonary embolism and life threatening blood clots. I was about to begin a chapter of life I’ll never forget, one that has left physical scars and emotional pain. What I’ve decided to do is express some of those experiences through art.

The first experience in multi media is called Three Birds.

Half way through ICU care I was losing it. The doctors worried I’d have to go on dialysis. My kidneys were shutting down, my heart was in trouble too. I was in trouble and I knew it so I asked my God, “Are you with me?” I needed to know if He knew his servant needed his comfort and approval. Continue reading “Three Birds”

Rise!

Posted on July 1, 2018March 20, 2022 by F.Magdalene

Rise
Bright watercolor and colored pencil.
8.5 x 5.5 inches
98lb paper

This is what hope looks like. It’s hands raised and face to the sun. Flowers in full bloom and shoulders light.

Faith Austin
Sundrip

Adopted Art: Jane’s Flowers Bloom

Posted on June 19, 2017June 19, 2017 by F.Magdalene

As you know, art without a wall of its own is sad, but today “Jane’s Flowers Bloom” was adopted. To celebrate this momentous occasion is the legendary Phil Collins singing, “In the Mail Tonight”.

Art Title:Â Jane’s Flowers Bloom
Art by:Â Faith Magdalene Austin
Media:Â Colored pencil, ink, card stock
Size:Â 4 x 7 inches
Finish: Acrylic seal, signed on the front and back, unmounted.
Style: Primitive, African Americana, Ethnic Folk Art

Take it away Phil!

Well I remembah, I remembah orange flurries, flurries, flurries
How could I ever forget
It’s the first bloom,
the white moon
and an intimate moment.
But I know the reason why you kept your purse closed up,
Oh no you can’t resist me.
Well the love it shows
and the heart it rose
with a flower from you to me
(enter awesome drum solo)
I can feel it coming in the mail tonight, hold on
I’ve been waiting for a wall of all my own, oh Lord, oh Lord
I’ll be coming in the mail tonight oh Lord
for a wall
of my own. oh Lord Â (end remake)

Me: Thank you so much Phil for coming to Sundrip to sing that classic song; a song for all time. What do you think Mary Jane, studio cat?
Mary Jane: That song chokes me up every time. He kills it on the drums. Amazing job Phil. Thanks for coming.
Me: Thanks to everyone who has given original art the only thing it’s ever wanted, a wall of its own.

Is there wall space in your home? Can you open your heart to grant the wish of original art? If so, please visit my Available Art galleries as well as my Etsy shop. Contact me and we’ll work together to stamp out homeless art.

Available Art. Available, too. Etsy shop. PayPalMe.

Faith Magdalene Austin
Artist
Mary Jane Austin
Studio Cat and Quality Control Manager