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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Anxiety Chronic Pain Lupus The People Behind My Eyes

High Anxiety

Boy, anxiety has been rough. Sleep has been rough. Pain, relentless! I’m scheduled to see a new Nurse Practioner in July because I have been unsuccessful in managing my anxiety and sleep issues. It’s been at least 5 years since I’ve had a Psychiatrist / Nurse Practioner. Hopefully this lady will be helpful with medications. […]

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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Anxiety Artists Thoughts Chronic Pain The People Behind My Eyes Therapy Review

Deep Breath

Wow! Anxiety has been high for over a week. It peaked today. I had to really concentrate on my breathing and slow it down. I’ve got a new diffuser because after 2 years, my Young Living diffuser went caput. The new one is also white and purple. Therapy was full of anxiety but not because […]

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Abuse Anxiety PTSD The People Behind My Eyes Therapy Review

Therapy Review: Boxed Memories and Emotions

We talked about my mother’s narcissistic traits such as the need to appear perfect and her inability to accept criticism of any kind. We talked about her viciousness and sadistic nature but not too much detail. Most of the time I talked and tried to keep from having to address the visualization technique for compartmentalization. […]

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Anxiety Chronic Pain I'm only human Major Depression PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Anxiety the Giant

Stress and anxiety have taken over the last two weeks. I stopped eating and took in fewer fluids than normal. I was exhausted. I could hardly breathe but my oxygen levels were very good so that made no sense. My chest was tight. I was faint, weak and had low blood pressure. They thought I […]

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Anxiety I'm only human Lupus PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Panic Mode

I go from sleepless nights to straight fatigue with an undercurrent of panic and impatience. I’ve vomited and stressed myself right into an outbreak all over my chest. I can’t get Benadryl until April 1st. Man. I’ve got a doctor’s appointment the 30th of this month. I wish I could cancel. I’ve got to calm […]

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Anxiety Art Art therapy Paper PTSD Sketchbook diary The People Behind My Eyes

Panic Attacks

I’m not sure what my problem is but I’ve been having panic attacks lately. Today’s panic attack included holding my chest, fast breathing and vomiting. I’m not sure what is causing it but it started over a week ago. I talked about it in therapy. I’m doing some deep breathing as well as keeping my […]

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(CRSD) Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Chronic Pain Lupus The People Behind My Eyes

The Pointless ER Visit

Well then, I guess even the ER is refusing real pain therapies to people with documented Lupus and Chronic Regional Sympathetic Dystrophy (CRSD). I showed up at a sustained level 9 pain with my foot and leg messed up only to be given a line of crap and some Tylenol. Uh huh, Tylenol! I cried. […]

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Anxiety I'm only human PTSD The People Behind My Eyes

Coping Safely. Lavender Weaponry.

As one can imagine, last night was rather rough. I believe I came to a pass where I refused to accept anymore stress that eats me up and spits me out. Depression flattens me on my back, anger makes me get up and move. Last night I got up and moved. I moved past the […]